The Sketch Book
by MuffinMartians
Summary: Jonathan locked away his fear-filled past once he started working in pure bottled fear but the Joker wants to know what made Dr Crane into the Scarecrow. He won't rest until he knows everything, whether Jonathan wants to remember or not. Warnings inside.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and the characters within them are not mine.

Warnings: Violence, swearing, slash, rape and the Joker is in this fic.

A/N: This story is following on from my one-shot Little Albert but you probably don't need to read it to figure things out. So this is a Nolanverse Crane origin story... enjoy.

* * *

**Chapter 1**

_He saw that tiny body lying there. Not moving. Not making a sound. Not breathing. He knew who it was. He could hear groaning and moaning sounds that began to increase in volume and echo around his head until it was combined with screaming and he couldn't..._

"Wake up," His eyes shot open as he felt himself be shoved by a large hand. "You were having a nightmare or something. Woke me up with your twitching," It was his Arkham cell mate who stood beside the bunk bed, now just staring at him. Jonathan lay on the bottom bunk, cold sweat drenching his forehead as he gathered his surroundings. He glared at his cell mate who still stood staring at him. "My wife used to have nightmares," The man grinned, showing off the teeth which had given him the name 'Snaggletooth'. They were disgusting, Jonathan was surprised the man could shut his mouth. Most of them were broken and rotting and some were elongated and filled with metal so they formed points and jagged edges. Jonathan quickly tried to re-call whether Snaggletooth actually had a wife or not. He had been sent to Arkham for crime involving biting... that was all Jonathan could remember.

Snaggletooth's grin suddenly turned sour as he leaned over Jonathan, putting one hand either side of his head. Jonathan mentally weighed the options of staying still and fighting back. His thoughts went to waste as Snaggletooth elbowed him hard in the stomach, grabbed both his arms with one hand and held them against the wall above Jonathan's head. Snaggletooth straddled him, keeping his legs pinned. Jonathan struggled but the man was three times his weight and it didn't help much. "You're my Pearl," Snaggletooth breathed. He stroked Jonathan's hip with his free hand and began ripping at his Arkham overalls with his horrible teeth.

There was no way he'd get out of this. Strangely it reminded him of his Batman encounters. He saw that Snaggletooth had ripped through the fabric on the right side of his torso and was staring at the exposed flesh hungrily. Jonathan looked away, shutting his eyes tightly. He flinched as he felt the jagged teeth rest on his skin, biting his lip so he didn't shout out in pain when Snaggletooth slowly dragged his teeth across the skin, tearing it open in places. He shuddered as Snaggletooth licked his nipple. His heart rate increased rapidly and he could hear the sound of water rushing in his head. He consciously knew that now was not the time to panic but the sound of the water in his head mingled with Snaggletooth's deep breathing as he lent into Jonathan's face and whispered "You're so pretty Pearl," just pushed him too far.

Something snapped in Jonathan's head. He felt angry. Intensely angry. His eyes shot open to see Snaggletooth's face still inches away from his. Jonathan lurched forward and bit Snaggletooth's nose hard. He yelled out in pain and brought both his hands to his nose, freeing Jonathan's hands. Jonathan grabbed the side of Snaggletooth's head and rammed it against the wall. Snaggletooth groaned and slumped sideways, loosening his hold on Jonathan's legs enough for him to get free. Jonathan grabbed Snaggletooth's head and forced it against the not-so padded wall again and again until he saw blood. He fixed his hands tightly around the thick neck, squeezing hard and watching Snaggletooth choke and turn blue, the sound of water still pounding in his head.

"What the hell?" Fucking Arkham guards. Jonathan was wrenched off Snaggletooth by a couple of astonished guards, strapped into a straight jacket and led out of the cell.

* * *

"I'm becoming increasingly worried about you," Jonathan sat in his psychologist's office, his new bite marks stinging under the bandages he'd gained at the infirmary. Snaggletooth was still out cold. Jonathan's psychologist sighed and rubbed his eyes, he looked appropriately tired for being called out at 4am to deal with Jonathan. A blonde woman sat nursing a cup of coffee in the corner of the room. Jonathan assumed she was a new intern.

Jonathan's psychologist's name was Doctor Henry Shield. He was a balding, portly, middle aged man with a kind face and the attitude to match. He was renowned as one of the few Arkham doctors to keep a cheery attitude after over a month of dealing with the patients. He seemed to genuinely care about his patients to the astonishment of all around him. This attitude also meant he was the most likely to be given new interns to instruct.

"Recently you've been angry and aggressive, very different from your usual behaviour," Shield stared at him with tired eyes, still somehow looking concerned "And now this," Jonathan said nothing to his psychologist and kept his face emotion-less, retaining eye contact with Shield. "Though you were... provoked in this circumstance, it's still unusual for you," He sighed "I and the Director apologise for what happened in your cell with Mr Rogers. The security cameras show that Rogers made the first move. I have no idea what would have caused him to act as he did and I will be taking the matter up with his psychologist. I must ask you a difficult question,"

Jonathan stayed silent, still keeping eye contact with Shield. Shield continued "Do you believe Rogers intended to seriously harm you or worse?" Silence. "Dr Crane, did Mr Rogers attempt to rape you?" Jonathan's mask slipped momentarily and the sharp eyed psychologist noticed and interpreted the flicker of emotion as a yes. Jonathan silently cursed as Shield's face showed the sympathy that he loathed. Then he berated himself for slipping up. "Remember what I'm here for Dr Crane," The intern shifted slightly and Jonathan took the opportunity to look at her and not Shield. She looked around twenty five and her name tag read 'H Quinzel – Intern'. She noticed she had attracted Jonathan's attention and looked momentarily frightened before giving him a weak, nervous smile. But Jonathan had noticed the fear. He smiled back pleasantly and saw the confusion flicker in her eyes. They keep eye contact for a while longer, it seemed like Ms Quinzel couldn't look away. Shield cleared his throat and Quinzel's head snapped towards him, broken from her trance. Jonathan smirked and faced Shield too. "This is Miss Harleen Quinzel. She is interning at Arkham and helping me today,"

"Nice to meet you Miss Quinzel," Jonathan smiled once again but Quinzel just smiled briefly his way before quickly looking back to Shield. Jonathan knew she was scared of him.

* * *

"And I thought you were a weakling!" The Joker pulled a chair over to where Jonathan had previously been sitting alone reading the newspaper. He placed the chair backwards in front of Jonathan and straddled it, resting his arms on the back of the chair and grinning. Jonathan glared at him which just made him grin wider.

"What do you want Joker?"

"Oh I just want to congratulate you on taking down a guy three times your weight with your bare hands," he paused then burst out laughing "I never thought I'd say that to you. How did you do it?" he didn't wait long for a response as he knew Jonathan wasn't going to give him one "I think," he dropped his voice and lent forward "you got angry," The grin on the Joker's face somehow grew wider as Jonathan narrowed his eyes. How did the Joker know? Jonathan worked to keep his face free of expression.

"I hit his head off the wall and almost strangled him," Jonathan spoke, keeping his voice level and calm. The Joker would love to know that he was bothering him, so Jonathan wouldn't give him that satisfaction. Maybe if Jonathan told him what had happened he'd go away.

"Why did you do it?" the Joker crooned in a strange mockery of sympathy "What made you so angry?" Jonathan's mind immediately thought of the sound of the water that had been pounding through his head.

"Why are you so interested?" He wasn't going to tell the Joker anything he could spread around to the other inmates. The Joker's grin faltered for just a moment and Jonathan's heart leaped in his chest. He didn't want to imagine what would happen to him if he got on the wrong side of the Joker. But the Joker's grin returned with more malice which strangely relaxed Jonathan. The Joker pushed forward on the chair so it stood on only two legs and he was closer to Jonathan.

"Oh you're much more interesting than you think you are," he purred, stretching both his hands towards Jonathan and clamping them on his shoulders. The Joker's chair fell forward but since it was so close to Jonathan it just rested against his knees. This propped the Joker up and trapped Jonathan in his own seat. But his hands were still free. One of the Joker's own hands snaked around to the back of Jonathan's neck and pushed his head forward so his forehead was almost touching the Joker's. "My little rummage into your pathetic dirge of a life came up with such fascinating things," The Joker hissed letting the hand at Jonathan's shoulder slip down so it was perched over the hidden bandages "But I want to the whole story," The Joker pushed hard on Jonathan's bite marks "From you," Jonathan gritted his teeth as the Joker twisted his palm and the wounds re-opened. He locked eyes with the Joker. The Joker was frowning with his teeth slightly bared. He knew he'd regret fighting back with his hands. The Joker wouldn't let him live to see lunch if he tried anything.

"Good luck," Jonathan hissed back "I don't remember my past, not anymore,"

"I know," The Joker smiled and returned both his hands to Jonathan's shoulders "But you will when I'm finished," He lent back and his chair fell away, freeing Jonathan and leaving the Joker with his arms crossed over the back of the chair, smiling almost pleasantly at Jonathan.

At lunch the Joker continued to shadow Jonathan, never saying a word but always following. This put Jonathan on edge and he almost stabbed an inmate with a fork when the inmate slammed his hand on Jonathan's table.

"I heard what you fucking did to Snaggletooth!" the inmate shouted before punching Jonathan in the head.

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A/N: I already have about another chapters worth written so hopefully I won't take forever to update. Hope you enjoyed, please review and watch out for more.

Oh and yes the title is a very vague reference. If you can pin point it you're very clever, review and show me how smart you are ;)


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and the characters within them are not mine.

Warnings: Violence, swearing, slash, rape and the Joker are in this fic.

* * *

**Chapter 2**

_He ran. He ran as fast as he could and as far as he could before his legs gave way and he crashed to the pavement panting for breath. He felt like his insides were burning, the pain in his legs from running only making it worse. The rain was heavy and it beat down on him just like the showers had. His long hair stuck to his face and his clothes felt like they were made of lead. He curled up into a ball and stayed where he'd fallen. It was like he'd crashed. His eyes stayed open but glazed over, not really seeing anything. He was a broken, pathetic shell of a human lying in the dirt where he belonged. He lay there was god knows how long, not moving and barely breathing while the rain continued to beat down._

"_You can't stay there my boy," A deep, gentle voice and a lack of rain on his head made his eyes refocus. He suddenly realised how cold he was and he shivered violently. A familiar man was crouched beside him holding an umbrella. The bearded man took hold of his arm and dragged him up, placing a large black coat around his shoulders and leading him away._

His eyes snapped open and he sat bolt upright. Then a searing pain in his head made him groan and lie back down. Back in the infirmary. How had he gotten here this time?

"You're finally awake," Jonathan recognised the Joker's voice and remained still "I thought I'd be kicked out before you woke up," Jonathan rose again, slower this time, to see the Joker sitting in the bed across from him sporting a few stitches on his cheekbone and a black eye. Jonathan groaned again. Just what he needed. Another 'friendly' chat what a murdering, psychotic clown. "I beat up the guy who punched you. You're knocked out really easily you know," The Joker grinned, seemingly un-caring of any pain caused by his stitches "And you were all twitchy when you were unconscious," The Joker hopped out of bed and crossed the room, kneeling beside Jonathan's bed "Like a dog dreaming," He rested his arms on the bed "But maybe you were... remembering something. Funny thing, the unconscious mind, isn't it Doctor?" He emphasised the last word.

"Very," There was no point lying to the Joker. Jonathan knew he wouldn't back down and would get the information he wanted anyway he could. Maybe he could use that, if he was co-operative the Joker would be much less likely to hurt him.

"Well?"

"I lay down on the sidewalk in the rain then someone picked me up and took me away," Confusion flickered across the Joker's face.

"Why did you lie on the sidewalk?"

"I was running and I fell. Then I just stayed,"

"What were you running from?"

"Water. It's something to do with water. The sound of water in my head made me almost kill Snaggletooth," The Joker's face was unreadable for a moment then he smiled.

"Isn't it nice to tell the truth to nurse Joker? Do you know who picked you up from your stupid sidewalk nap?"

"It was a man with a beard," Jonathan sighed, trying not to mentally picture the Joker in a nurse's uniform. The Joker laughed.

"Now we're getting somewhere, did you know the bearded man?"

"He seemed familiar,"

"Uncle, neighbour, Daddy?"

"It was someone I trusted,"

"So no one in your family. Is this all you can remember?"

"Yes, is that enough?"

"Oh plenty for now," The Joker stood up. He walked to the empty nurse's desk and grabbed the beaker of water before returning to Jonathan's bed. Jonathan tried to get up but he'd been strapped to the bed. The Joker got on the bed and straddled him, grabbing him by the hair with his free hand and forcing his scarred mouth onto Jonathan's lips, tipping the beaker of water over Jonathan's head as he did so. He pulled away and rammed Jonathan's head back against metal bed post, sending him into darkness once again.

"_Hey Jonathina!" Urg he hated Gym. Especially running. It was just another way for the stupid dick head jocks to taunt him. He kept his head down and continued running, ignoring the four figures surrounding him._

"_You run like a girl,"_

"_You look like a girl,"_

"_You are a girl,"_

"_Jonathina!" _

_If Jonathan hadn't heard these same four jibes from the same four jocks he might have been offended. The jock to his right made an unsuccessful attempt to trip him then all four ran ahead laughing. Jonathan saw one of them look back over their shoulder and he avoided eye contact. _

_Jonathan always tried his best to avoid showering at school. Yes it was disgusting and he always showered first thing when he got home but there's no way in hell he'd give the meat head jocks anymore ammunition against him. This was why he was hiding a toilet cubicle, standing on the toilet seat so coach wouldn't see his feet when he checked around to see if everyone had left. Coach had just been by five minutes ago and Jonathan couldn't hear anyone in the changing rooms. He slowly placed his feet on the ground and pushed the cubicle door open as quietly as he could. He looked around before leaving the cubicle and creeping silently through the changing rooms. He reached his gym locker and breathed a sigh of relief. _

_The absence of sound and people in the normally crowded and shout filled changing room had freaked him out the first time he'd hidden to avoid showering but by now the quiet just calmed him. He'd always end up going home late after gym but his parents didn't notice if he wasn't home anyway so it hardly mattered. _

_Jonathan pulled open his locker and cursed the mirror fixed to the inside of the door. He hated when he forgot it was there and he couldn't avoid looking at himself. His mother said he looked like an angel. His father said he looked like a fag. He cursed his feminine features, especially his stupid bush baby eyes courtesy of his mother's side of the family. Maybe the long hair was his own fault but he wasn't going to get it cut if it meant going to the psychopath of a barber his father loved so much. He sighed and pulled his gym shirt over his head. If he was ever going to get home he'd have to get changed._

_When he was on the verge of stuffing the shirt into his locker he caught sight of something other than his own reflection in the mirror. He'd seen a person. He immediately thought of coach as his head snapped towards the now approaching figure. His heart rate increased as he realised it was one of the jocks from earlier. Jonathan recalled that this one was called Will Carter, he was tall, blonde, muscular and had some bubble head blonde cheerleader for a girlfriend. He was the perfect jock. A whole stereotype epitomised in one guy. He was the jock that had looked back as the others ran off. Jonathan stood frozen to the spot. How had he not heard Carter? Why was that asshole still here? And why was he only wearing a towel? Jonathan's mouth dropped open as he fully registered that last point and he took a shaky step back as Carter stood right in front of him. He suddenly felt very exposed by his lack of shirt._

"_You're a naughty little freak Jonathina," Carter grinned as he looked down at Jonathan "You know coach orders us to shower after gym. But you hide in the toilets so you don't have to," He grabbed Jonathan's head and rammed him against the lockers, holding him against them so his face was pressed to the cold metal. "You shouldn't have the fucking nerve to disobey coach!" Carter shouted, twisting his fingers into Jonathan's long hair with one hand and grabbing one of his wrists in a vice like grip with the other. He began dragging Jonathan across the room "I'll make you shower," Carter's smug grin returned. Carter was strong, even though Jonathan struggled with all his strength it did nothing to halt their progress towards the showers. When they were just outside the showers Carter pushed Jonathan against the wall, fixing one hand around his neck and squeezing tightly. Jonathan struggled to breathe and thought that Carter might just kill him here. But when Jonathan brought his own hands limply to the hand choking him Carter wrenched Jonathan's pants and underwear off in one swift motion. Jonathan would have gasped if he had the breath, his eyes bugging out as the niggling worry that Carter would do... this, the voice he'd pushed to the back of his mind for even suggesting that Carter wanted to do anything than force him under the water or drown him, came screaming into the for front of his mind. He's going to fucking rape you! It screamed over and over as Carter dragged him into the showers and hit the button to turn on the water. Jonathan closed his eyes as tightly as he could and wished his mind could leave his body. Carter pressed him face first against the shower wall and Jonathan yelped as Carter's skin made contact with his. His finger nails scratched the tiles as the balled up his fists and Carter's fingers gripped into his hair. Carter groaned in his ear, barely audible over the crashing water, "You're a pretty girl," Jonathan felt like his brain shut down as he tried to block it all out. He knew he was pressed against the shower wall being completely violated but he closed his mind off, anything but acknowledge what was happening to his body._

_Carter mustn't have left too long ago as the water was still running. Jonathan numbly stumbled to his feet, somehow walking back to his locker and pulling on his clothes without thinking or instructing his body to do so._

"_Hey! What are you still doing here?" Jonathan's mind snapped back into place as he heard the angry male voice shout at him. His body flooded with fear and adrenalin and he ran as fast as he could from the locker rooms. _

_He ran. He had no idea how long he ran before his legs gave way and he crashed to the ground. The rain thundered down on his body and he finally noticed how much pain he was in. His every muscle throbbed and he was filled with an intense burning. His thoughts were a horrible jumble of screaming, semi-coherent voices and horrible images. He lay in the dirt, not daring to move and letting his mind shut down once again, a haze settling over him this time, more like a blanket muffling his thoughts than the complete absence he'd achieved earlier. He just lay, eyes wide and unfocused as the rain drenched him through._

"_You can't stay there my boy," the deep gentle voice broke through Jonathan's self inflicted mind fog and his eyes re-focused. The familiar bearded man held an umbrella over his body, which at some point had curled into the foetal position. The man gently pulled Jonathan to his feet and placed his large black coat over Jonathan's skinny shoulders, leading him away. "If the janitor hadn't seen you and contacted me I might not have found you," _

"_Thank you Professor Strange," Jonathan mumbled lifelessly._

"_It's quite alright boy," Strange smiled sadly. "Now I'm going to take you to my home because you look like you'll freeze to death if you don't warm up soon. Is that okay?" Jonathan nodded and wrapped his arms around himself as he shivered._

_Strange lived in a large, fancy house but Jonathan wasn't really admiring the decor as Strange steered him towards a fireplace. He lit the fire and got the shivering Jonathan to sit in front of it._

"_I'll see if I can find you some different clothes," Strange began to leave the room but a question had processed through Jonathan's numb mind._

"_Did the janitor know why I was there?" he asked. Strange turned to face him._

"_No, he just thought you were loitering,"_

"_Do you...?" Jonathan trailed off, shivering again and looking at the carpet. He heard Strange sigh and the man came back to the fireplace and knelt beside him._

"_I can guess my dear boy, from your injuries, where the janitor saw you and his report that you looked wet and terrified," Jonathan continued to look at the floor in front of him, his vision blurred without his glasses, watching the water drip from his head and sink into the thick carpet. Strange lightly patted his back, took something from his pocket, placed it beside him and left the room. Jonathan slowly turned his head to see what Strange had left. A handkerchief. He brought his hands to his face and felt the tears roll down his cheeks. He hadn't even noticed, with all the other water... He picked up the handkerchief and pressed it against his eyes, his breaths coming out in wretched sobs. He was truly pathetic._

_Jonathan stood in Strange's bathroom, glowering at his reflection in the mirror. He was mostly dry by now although the ends of his hair were still damp. His stupid, long, girly hair. When he'd changed into the clothes Strange had given him he'd found he was covered in bruises and small cuts. And he had what looked horrifically like bite marks ingrained deeply in his shoulder. He shuddered and swallowed the pain killers Strange had hidden amongst the clothes. His borrowed clothes were far too big for him, the long sleeved dark brown t-shirt hung off his skinny frame and he'd had to put an extra hole in the belt to hold up the baggy black pants. _

_He picked up the scissors he'd borrowed, or took while Strange wasn't looking, and took one last look at his hair. As he held the scissors hundreds of images flickered through his head, he could ram the blades through his hand, cut through the baggy clothes or carve patterns into the walls, so many options, but he shook his head to clear it and began snipping at his hair. He cut away until it was much shorter. It wasn't the most professional cut ever but his stupid, long, girly hair was gone and that was all that mattered. _

_When he exited the bathroom he found Strange waiting on the other side of the door. He looked at Jonathan's new haircut and gave him a calculating look._

"_Is that all you used the scissors for?" Jonathan nodded and handed them back to Strange, who let out a sigh of relief, evidently relieved Jonathan hadn't tried to kill himself with them. _

"_Thank you for everything Professor, I think I should go home now," Jonathan still ached all over despite the pain killers and he felt like going to sleep._

"_Of course, your mother will be worried. Do you want me to escort you?" _

"_No thanks, I'll be fine Professor,"_

"_Okay my boy, if you're sure," Strange smiled and reached into his pocket, pulling out Jonathan's glasses and handing them to him. Jonathan put them on and was momentarily elated by the clarity of his vision before he remembered that he'd left these in his gym locker at school. He looked up at Strange, confused. "I got the janitor to bring your things, he's an old associate of mine who was happy to help. He still doesn't suspect anything, no need to worry," Strange answered his un-asked question and led him down the hall._

_Jonathan opened the front door as quietly as he could but he needn't have bothered as his mother was standing beside the door to use the phone. Her large blue eyes, the ones Jonathan had inherited, looked momentarily shocked before relief flooded her face._

"_Jonathan? Oh Jonathan!" She flung her arms around him. He stiffened and hissed as she inadvertently pressed down on bruises and cuts. She noticed and loosened her hold, still keeping her arms around him. She looked at him with her face filled with worry and concern. She looked older than she really was when she was worried. "Where have you been? Are you okay? I was just about to phone the school..."_

"_I'm fine," Jonathan lied, looking down into his mother's face. He did look a lot like her, though his features were stronger and he was already taller than her. As she looked up at him something seemed to click._

"_You've cut your hair..." she reached up to touch the messily cut strands "and these aren't your clothes,"_

"_I'm fine," he repeated, squeezing his eyes shut and swallowing as his eyes prickled dangerously. She didn't say or do anything for a moment then she hugged him again, gently this time, and spoke quietly._

"_It's okay," She let go of him and let him go to his room._

_Jonathan turned off his lights and crawled completely under his bed sheets, curling up, wrapping his arms around his legs and tucking his chin into his knees. He lay motionless, sleep not coming, in that cosy position. After a while he heard his door softly click open then close again. He pulled the covers off his head to look at the door and saw a sandwich and a glass of water resting on the floor._

"_Thanks mom," he whispered into the darkness._

_

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_

**A/N: Thank you to Sarah for letting me constantly bother her with this ;) Also thanks to Jaime Snyder for reviewing and the people who have this on story alert. Hopefully I won't be too long with the next chapter. Remember to review.**


	3. Chapter 3

****

Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and the characters within them are not mine.

Warnings: Violence, swearing, slash, rape and the Joker is in this fic. Though this chapter is pretty tame.

A/N: I'm so sorry I haven't updated in ages. I've had at least three pieces of coursework (if you don't know what that is read as 'big ass project') to do since my last update. And medical problems and no desire to write this story. I have to kind of force myself. This chapter is a bit short and filler-ish but I thought I should put it up for the sake of updating. Hope you enjoy it anyway, sorry for the long wait.

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**Chapter 3**

Waking up was very painful. His head hurt a _lot_. He kept his eyes shut, sat up slowly and put his hands tentatively on his head, feeling a large bruise at the back. His hair was its normal length, which relieved him momentarily, before his newly remembered memories came flooding back into the fore front of his mind.

He'd been raped in high school. By some jock. He opened his eyes and immediately saw the Joker on the bed across from him, heavily strapped down and sleeping. His gaze set and his face fixed into a scowl. He found his own restraints had been taken off, he was only a low security patient and they'd probably expected him to be out for longer. He slipped out of his bed and walked over to the Joker's, still glaring intensely at the sleeping clown. He shook the Joker and muttered

"Wake up," This had no effect. Jonathan shook him harder this time. "Wake up," he spoke louder. Still nothing.

Jonathan went to the nurse's desk and took a glass of water. He returned to the Joker, grabbed the front of his Arkham overalls and tipped the water over his head, shouting "Wake up!" in the mad man's face.

That woke the Joker up, his expression flickering through confusion and anger for a nano second before he burst out laughing. That just made Jonathan angrier. He smashed the top of the empty glass against the metal cabinet beside the Joker's bed, breaking it into a jagged point which Jonathan held an inch away from the Joker's forehead. The Joker stopped laughing and stared cross eyed at the glass before looking at Jonathan. He smiled.

"Is this how you say good morning?" Jonathan brought the glass closer.

"Shut the fuck up clown, I don't want to hear anything except answers from you," The Joker frowned but miraculously kept quiet, staring at Jonathan and waiting from him to ask a question.

"You knew what you were making me remember didn't you?" he spat.

"That depends, what did you remember?" The Joker's smiled was back for a moment before Jonathan fixed a hand round his throat. He tightened his grip and felt the Joker's pulse beneath his fingers.

"Don't play games with me clown," he said darkly "You knew exactly what you were doing," He relaxed his hold to let the Joker breathe and answer properly though still kept his hand at the clown's throat.

"If you mean I 'made' you remember being fucked in the high schools showers then I definitely knew what I was doing," he growled, the teasing edge to his voice causing Jonathan's anger to rise higher and his hand to clench tightly around the Joker's throat. He watched the Joker turn purple then let go again.

"Why?" The Joker coughed and his breaths were harsh but he smiled again, his voice rasping,

"I wanted to know for sure what that guy did to deserve such a severe punishment. You didn't hide it very well, I'm surprised the GPD didn't guess it was you," Jonathan's confusion showed on his face as the Joker laughed slightly before breaking out into a coughing fit and continuing. "Didn't you remember what you did to him? We'll have to knock you out again..." Jonathan glared and the Joker quickly said "All the strangling doesn't help me talk," Jonathan's mouth twitched up into his best cruel smile.

"I know, I just want to strangle you," The Joker let out a week, wheezy laugh.

"Oh I like you Jonathan, you're much more fun than you look,"

"What did I do to him?" Jonathan asked, not as angry now, he sounded more curious.

"I hear doctors coming our way," The Joker spoke just before Jonathan heard footsteps approaching. He pushed the broken glass under the Joker's bed with his feet, throwing the piece he'd been considering jamming through the Joker's head there too and returned to his bed. He knew the doctors would notice the Joker had had water poured over his head but he could pretend he hadn't menaced him with a glass or strangled him.

The infirmary door opened and in walked the intern Jonathan's psychologist was looking after. She looked nervously around and spotted Jonathan. She looked pale and worn out. This madhouse must be getting to her, Jonathan had seen it happen hundreds of times over his years as director. He'd also prompted it a few times. He smiled at her as she stood by the door and resembled a startled deer. It was his well practised business smile, the one he'd used when he'd been forced to meet with people he disliked and needed to convey his displeasure at talking to them politely.

"Miss Quinzel I believe?" he stated when she continued to just stand motionless by the door, staring at him. She seemed to snap instantly into action, smiling broadly and walking over to his bed.

"Hi Doctor Crane, I'm here to check on you for Doctor Shield," Jonathan narrowed his eyes at her.

"That's unusual. Shield doesn't normally send anyone to 'check up' on his patients in the infirmary," The Joker chose this moment to fake snore really loudly. Quinzel jumped.

"I-I just needed to be useful in some way," she stuttered, standing by Jonathan's bed and looking out the corner of her eyes at the Joker. Jonathan noticed a hint of a Brooklyn accent in her voice that hadn't been there when she'd spoken before. Was she hiding her accent? Jonathan noticed she had one hand behind her back.

"Don't lie to me," Jonathan knew she was up to something. He didn't move in case she really was sent by Shield and this was some kind of test. She stared at him and looked terrified then muttered

"Sorry," before quickly lent forward and placed the hand tightly over his face. _Chloroform!_ Jonathan thought before slipping back into the darkness.

* * *

_Strange had been very surprised to see him back at school after what had happened yesterday. He had taken Jonathan into his office when he spotted him in the corridor._

"_Are you sure you're fit enough Jonathan?"_

"_Yes Doctor Strange,"_

"_You must be in physical pain at least..."_

"_I'm fine Doctor Strange," Strange lent back in his chair and sighed. In truth Jonathan was in pain, a lot of pain, but he was ignoring it the best he could._

"_Alright my boy, just... be careful," Jonathan stood._

"_I will," He said as he left the office. He didn't have long until class started and he was going to be late. _

_He decided to take the quick way instead of his normal route, turning into the main corridor where the lockers were. He only made it a few steps before a voice made him freeze. He saw the group of jocks and quickly backed towards the wall at the side of the corridor, slipping into the small space in between two sets of lockers, hiding himself from view. __He breathed erratically and stayed hided in the shadows, his heart beating fast. _

_Jonathan had seen Carter amongst those jocks, heard him laughing and talking with his friends just as he always had. They must not know anything. He heard the voices and the footsteps of the jocks getting closer and he stopped breathing. He heard the footsteps stop a few feet from his hiding place. He could hear them talking clearly._

"_Great weekend man,"_

"_Totally. We totally crashed that car!"_

"_And we found out Carter's afraid of corn!"_

"_I am not!"_

"_Okay then, corn fields, sheesh,"_

"_It's not the fields, it's the scarecrows. They freak me out,"_

"_Yeah, whatever, you're just afraid of corn,"_

_The slamming of lockers and the bell for class ringing drowned out any further conversation and the jocks walked away in the opposite direction from Jonathan's hiding place. Once the corridor was silent, Jonathan slipped out from between the lockers... and straight into Strange. _

"_Jonathan, go home. I'm ordering you as head school councillor, you are not ready to be back at school yet," Strange said sternly, taking Jonathan by the shoulders and steering him towards the closest exit. He knew he should be embarrassed that Strange had seen him hiding so pathetically but an idea was forming in his head, pushing everything else out of his mind._

* * *

_When Jonathan got home he went straight to his room, ignoring the confused look his mom gave him. He pushed his wardrobe to the right then pulled up the carpet that had been underneath it, revealing the loose floor board. He worked at the floor board with his fingers, managing to wrench it up after a few seconds of prying. He rummaged through the stuff he'd hidden from his father until he found what he was looking for: "Phobias and Fears: A Guide to your Nightmares" It was an old book, the cover was falling off and the pages were yellowing but it was still readable. He sat on his bed and carefully opened the well thumbed text, finding what he was looking for instantly. _

_Scarecrows: Although intended to scare birds away the scarecrow is an object of fear for many, some fearing it is 'watching' them, as if it is alive._

_It was a short section, but it fuelled his idea. He left his room and entered the kitchen, pausing for just a moment to read the note his mom had left on the kitchen table. Seemed she'd gone shopping for a while so he'd have the house to himself. He opened the closet under the stairs and used a torch to search through the jumble of items. He found an old hat he knew must have once been a part of a terrible costume for some fancy dress party his parents went to and an old potato sack. He took his mom's sewing kit from its place beside the couch and returned to his room._

_Jonathan lay out his findings on his bed, along with the over sized clothes Strange had given him yesterday. He set to work altering the potato sack so it would fit over his head and look like a 'real' scarecrow's face. He ripped off his glasses and pulled it over his head to check to eye holes were in the right place. _

_He instantly loved it, the feel of it, the slightly rough material against his skin, the way it covered his face entirely. He put on the baggy clothes and hat and went to look in the full length mirror in the hall. Jonathan didn't recognise himself. Good. He tried holding his arms out straight and letting his head fall forward, replicating the pose of a scarecrow attached to a piece of wood. The costume worked. He looked just like a scarecrow. He checked the time and his excitement rose. He had enough time to get where he needed to go before school ended. When the final bell rang and Carter tried to go home he was going to get a big surprise._

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**A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter. I love reviews, I become pathetically excited and euphoric when ever I recieve one... okay I've got to cut down on writing Jonathan POV, it's infecting my brain and making me type in his 'voice'. Please review.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and the characters within them are not mine.**

**Warnings: Violence, swearing, slash, rape and the Joker is in this fic. This chapter contains mention of mutilation. This is some serious stuff here.**

**A/N: So I left this story sitting for a while with no desire or drive to write it then BAM, my fire is back and I wrote two pages in one night. Yes I wrote this chapter in the past two days and I actually quite like it, hope you do to. Though I do get the feeling I may have written in an accent... (damn To Kill a Mockingbird and it's southern accents) You'll find out, just read.**

* * *

**Chapter 4**

_He waited in the alleyway, his arms out and resting against the wall, attempting to look like an abandoned scarecrow. He was just visible, he didn't want to attract unneeded attention. Five people had walked by, they had glanced at him but just assumed he was another piece of hastily discarded trash in the alleyway. _

_Jonathan knew Carter and his jocks would walk home through these streets. Not many people came this way, it wasn't a favourable area and the people that had passed by were moving fast. No one wanted to hang around long for fear of getting mugged. This was just a bonus to Jonathan as he was less likely to be disturbed. He hadn't been waiting long and he knew they'd be here soon. _

_He almost smiled when he saw Carter and two jocks at the other side of the street, but he stayed still, keeping up his act. He saw the moment Carter caught sight of him. He stopped dead in the middle of the sidewalk, his friends continuing without him for a few feet before noticing his absence and turning back. They looked across the street too and one of then started jumping and pointing. Jonathan was reminded of a chimp he once saw on TV. They each grabbed one of Carter's shoulders and dragged him across the road, stopping a few feet from Jonathan the scarecrow as Carter snapped back to life and resisted._

"_Dude, go on, it's just a stick and some cloth," The jock on Carter's right spoke. Jonathan believed he was called Alex Barr. He had broken his nose at least three times, leaving him with lumpy features to match his bulky shape. He was in no way attractive and his relationship with his bimbo girlfriend had assured Jonathan that cheerleaders really didn't care about anything but the 'status' of their boyfriends._

"_No way," Carter gulped, staring transfixed at Jonathan. Jonathan observed him. Carter was sweating, his eyes wide, his stance guarded. He was terrified but trying to hide it in front of Barr and the other jock. He wasn't doing a good job._

"_Yeah, do it or we're telling Lana you're afraid of corn," The other jock laughed, prodding Carter roughly in the shoulder. He was Ken Bates, short with dirty blonde hair and no personality to speak of. He laughed when the others laughed and couldn't think of his own comebacks. He was basically a drone._

"_Seriously?" Carter stopped looking at Jonathan and the other jocks nodded, grinning ear to ear at their friend's pain. Carter sighed, "Fine, I'll go touch the freaky scarecrow,"_

_As Carter approached him, Jonathan's heart rate increased dramatically. He kept still and thought of his plan to clear his head. Carter inched towards him slowly, the jibes of Barr and Bates doing nothing to speed him up. Carter gulped and stretched his arm out, lightly prodding Jonathan's hand. _

_Jonathan grabbed his wrist and Carter screamed. Jonathan smiled under his mask as Carter yelled his head off. Jonathan held on tightly, Carter's lack of coherent thought keeping him still._

"_Faggot," Jonathan growled, making his voice deeper than normal to disguise it. Jonathan brought up his foot and kicked Carter square in the groin. He was glad he'd taken an extra ten minutes to dig up his father's old steel capped boots. Carter's expression was priceless. He dropped to the floor in agony, Jonathan still holding his wrist. __Barr and Bates yelled and swore a lot before running off at full speed. Jonathan figured they might have enough decency to call for help, even if they hadn't bothered staying to defend Carter, so he'd have to wrap this up quick. _

_He kicked Carter a few more times, not caring where his blows landed, then pulled the knife he'd managed to hide out from under his shirt. He rolled the unconscious, bleeding Carter onto his back and cut his pants off. He made one long cut down Carter shaft, almost wishing Carter was awake so he could see him scream. Then he bolted down the alleyway, running as fast as he could, as far as he could through the back lanes. He ripped off his mask and hat as he ran, also hiding the knife back in his clothing._

_When he reached home he was out of breath. He leaned against a wall outside and panted. He broke into a smile and laughed, still gasping for air but he couldn't control the sudden laughing fit. He felt great. Adrenaline still rushed through his body, adding another level to his elation. He slid down the wall still laughing, sitting on the cold ground just laughing for around ten minutes. Once he'd managed to regain most of his composure, a small giggle seeping from his lips occasionally but otherwise controlled, he stood again and entered his home._

_His mom was still out so he had time to clean his knife, get changed and hide everything under his floorboard. He tried to look as normal as possible for when his mom got home. He sat on the couch with a book, not really taking any of the words in as he read. He jumped when the door opened, an old reflex he'd acquired from years of his father's eventful returns home._

"_Hello dear," his mom called. Jonathan pretended to be engrossed in his book, only looking up when she clattered by him with her shopping bags._

"_Hi mom," he muttered, his usual greeting for when she came home._

"_You look pleased, good book?" she commented, eying him with slight suspicion but smiling as she normally did._

"_Oh very," Jonathan responded, only then realising he had been grinning to himself. She shook her head and went into the kitchen to put the shopping away. She paused and called over her shoulder,_

"_Well I suppose any book would be funny upside down,"_

_Jonathan flushed and slowly turned his book around. No wonder he couldn't take any of it in._

_---_

_The next day school was abuzz with gossip about Carter. By lunch the rumours were wild; he'd been attacked by a ten foot snake and when it bit him his balls exploded, he'd battled an evil barber who took his penis as a prize in a game of poker or, Jonathan's favourite though less dramatic than the others, he'd tried to iron his trousers while he was still in them. Jonathan only heard one mention of a scarecrow but it had been a tale involving wizard of oz sex games and Carter's involvement with the lion's teeth. Barr and Bates (now forever known as Dorothy and the Tin man in Jonathan's mind) weren't in school either. Jonathan had attempted to avoid Strange all day but his luck ran out as Strange caught him in a corridor at the end of school. He sat in Strange's office once again, staring intently at his clasped hands._

"_Jonathan I know you've been avoiding me and I know why," Jonathan kept staring at his hands, not moving, making no changes in his behaviour. Strange couldn't manipulate him that easily. "You needn't worry, I will not be telling the authorities about William Carter's forced carnal knowledge of you," Jonathan almost looked up but resisted. He knew Strange had sensed a change in him though. "I honestly don't believe you have it in you to commit such a crime. Do you know what happened to William, Jonathan?"_

"_I've heard rumours," Jonathan murmured, still refusing eye contact. _

"_I doubt any of them are true," Strange sighed before continuing, "He was found in an alley way in rather bad shape with injuries to his genitalia. With the nature of the crime a recent... rape victim of his would be a prime suspect. I don't wish to force that on you Jonathan, I know you wouldn't be capable of that," Strange got up from behind his desk and walked over to Jonathan, standing at the side of his chair and patting his shoulder. "You needn't worry my boy," He kept his hand on Jonathan's shoulder. Jonathan wanted to leave the office. Now._

"_Thank you Professor Strange. May I go home now?" Jonathan looked up, keeping his expression as blank as he could, resisting the urge to flinch away from Strange's hand. Strange's expression was calculated as he saw the affect his 'paternal' touch had on Jonathan. No matter how he tried to hide it he was sure Strange could see how uncomfortable he was._

"_Yes, you may. You're dismissed Jonathan," Strange took his hand back and Jonathan rose slowly from the seat, resisting the urge to run as he left. He walked calmly all the way out of school, making sure he was a good distance away from the gates before letting out a sigh of relief. He hadn't thought about Strange. He'd just wanted revenge. At least it seemed Strange was on his side and didn't suspect him. He'd still have to keep his guard up though. He'd also have to try not to freak out next time Strange patted him on the shoulder. He'd never done that before when anyone else had shown him vague affection. Maybe it was the circumstances._

_---_

"He should be up by now," A growl seeped through the darkness "Why isn't he awake!" The sound of objects crashing to the ground and papers flying added to the shouting. He knew it was the Joker. "Well?" The Joker shouted again. There was a pause before a female voice whispered,

"I don't know," Another pause, much more dangerous this time, before the Joker stage whispered

"You don't know?" Something was kicked across the room and the woman yelped.

"You don't know," he said mockingly with a high pitched voice before dropping to a growl "Why, why don't you know?" Another pause, another yelp. The Joker spoke quietly,

"Oh Harleen, what am I going to do with you? I can't protect someone who is so..." A slam and a stifled scream suggested the Joker had just rammed her against the wall.

"Useless," His growl was back. Jonathan heard footsteps approach him and muffled sobs from the other side of the room. It seemed the Joker was done tormenting Quinzel.

Jonathan opened his eyes and found himself tried to a chair in a small room he recognised as one of the old solitary rooms found in old Arkham. The building had been renovated years back to put in new security technology but the old rooms had been left underneath. Psychologists and inmates alike called it the bowels of Arkham and most claimed screams could be heard coming from the cells. Jonathan had put these rooms to good use throughout his years as director. They were perfect for testing his fear gas and hiding the people who failed his experiments.

The room he, the Joker and Quinzel were currently in was a dull green, one light bulb hanging from the ceiling, not casting much light and leaving the edges of the room in shadows. His chair was situated directly below the light. The Joker stood with his back to Jonathan kicking pieces of paper and other debris around the room. Jonathan could just make out Quinzel quietly sobbing in the shadows across the room.

"Joker," Jonathan spoke clearly, causing the Joker's head to snap towards him "You don't know how to treat women."

* * *

**A/N: That cheesy line might have just saved Jonathan's ass from a Joker kicking. Thanks to all the reviewers from last chapter, I appreciate the support. I'm honestly surprised how much interest this story has. I think dear Jonathan Crane is a popular man. Hope you enjoyed reading, please review. If you're lucky I might get another chapter out soon.**


	5. Chapter 5

****

**Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and the characters within them are not mine.**

**Warnings: Violence, swearing, slash, rape and the Joker is in this fic. **

**A/N: Pretty quick update by some of my standards. Enjoy the chapter and please review.**

* * *

**Chapter 5**

The Joker stopped and stared at Jonathan for a moment before bursting out laughing. That man could sustain his laughter longer than any human should. The Joker stopped laughing abruptly and stood directly in front of Jonathan. He bent over and placed his hands over Jonathan's, which were currently tied at the wrists to the arms of the chair.

"I see you're awake. Did you have fun reliving your revenge?" he smiled unpleasantly. Jonathan didn't respond but he couldn't help glaring. The Joker chuckled, tracing his nails down Jonathan's hands. "William Carter, sports champion of your school before you cut his dick up. It's hard to run with that kind of injury, if you know what I mean," he giggled before continuing, his nails now scratching across Jonathan's hands, leaving red lines across the skin

"You ruined his sports career. I'm proud of you," he stopped digging his nails into Jonathan's skin and just rested his hands on top of Jonathan's. He grinned broadly "Before I found that part of your tragic life I thought you were just a whack job psychologist. But no," The Joker slid his hands underneath Jonathan's and took hold of Jonathan's fingers. When Jonathan tried to move away, by pulling his hands up as much as he could manage, the Joker tightened his grip and let his nails bite into Jonathan's hands.

"You're truly crazy," he lent closer "Just. Like. Me," He laughed again and let go of Jonathan's hands. The Joker was still kneeling in front of Jonathan's chair and Jonathan wished his legs were untied so he could kick him out of his laughing fit. Jonathan was rather unfazed by the Joker's sudden declaration of unity, he used to get the same thing from three patients a week. They were the ones he tested his first experimental gas on if memory served correctly. Only the Joker's laugh truly annoyed him.

When the Joker stopped laughing he stood and walked towards Quinzel, speaking in a sing song voice "Oh Harleeeen, come out of the shadows and say hello to our guest," Jonathan could just see her sitting on the floor against the wall, wrapping her arms tighter around her legs as the Joker approached, trembling slightly. He couldn't see her face for the shadows but he assumed she looked terrified. Shame he couldn't see that really.

"Harleen... come on now, don't be rude, say hello," The Joker sounded stern now, waiting by Quinzel as she didn't move and certainly didn't speak. He sighed "Fine then," and grabbed her wrist. She squealed as he dragged her across the floor, into the light. He pulled her haphazardly to her feet, slipping his arms around her waist and holding her tightly. She looked like she'd rather be anywhere else in the world than in direct contact with the Joker. Her face was tear stained, her makeup streaked down her face and she had little white marks where the Joker had obviously touched her with his makeup stained hands. Jonathan saw some around her neck as well as the smear under her right eye and the other marks dotted seemingly randomly across her hands and face.

"Here is Harleen, I'm sure you've met before," The Joker spoke again "and Harleen," he moved his head so his mouth was directly beside her ear "this is Jonathan," he growled "Say. Hello,"

"Hello Jonathan," She whispered in a high pitched voice, leading Jonathan to believe the Joker's grip around her waist might be tighter than he had thought. Jonathan nodded curtly. He was going to resist the Joker's sick games the best he could.

"Now I'll tell you, Jonathan, why we need Harleen," Jonathan didn't respond, he knew the Joker didn't need a response to keep talking "We need a woman to provoke all those memories of yours which have females in them. Specifically, when you err... 'created' little Albert," Quinzel looked horrified and Jonathan glared at the Joker's grinning face. Confusion flashed across his face for less than a second before he laughed "Oh! You both thought I wanted you to fuck! Well if I can't get the memories I want..." he laughed even harder at the disgusted look Jonathan threw him "Sheesh, lighten up. I know how you feel about rape,"

The Joker let go of Quinzel and walked to the edge of the room. When Jonathan couldn't see him for the bad lighting he called back "We'll talk about your new memories when I'm not busy Jonathan. Harleen, knock him out in ten minutes. I'll be back in an hour," Jonathan heard a door open and close and assumed the Joker had just left the room. Harleen stood still, staring into the darkness where the Joker had left. Then she slowly kicked back into action, picking pieces of paper, files and containers off the floor and placing them at the edges of the room where Jonathan assumed there must be desks of some kind. He could just make out her picking up containers and looking at them, probably searching for something to fulfil the Joker's orders with.

"Miss Quinzel?" She froze, a small metal canister in her hand "Miss Quinzel, are you alright?" Jonathan spoke softly. She dropped the container, put her face in her hands and shook with sobs. Jonathan put on his best caring face, once used for fooling the families of patients who lost their lives to his experiments. "Why are you working for him Harleen? Did he threaten you?" She somehow cried harder but she turned to face him, illuminated properly by the light so he could see her more clearly.

"He...He said he'd... pr-protect me," she gulped, not moving her hands from her face.

"Are you willing to tell me what he said he'd protect you from?" She shook her head feverishly. "Has he hurt you?" She looked up from her hands, her face white and a look of sheer terror on her face "You can tell me Harleen, I won't tell him anything you say," She swallowed.

"Kind of, he throws me around and threatens me and stuff but never, y'know..." her accent was rather prominent when she wasn't hiding it. Jonathan noted she opened up to him easily, then thought for a moment and spoke,

"Harleen... would you be interested in a deal?"

"What kind of a deal?" She sounded suspicious but hopeful.

"If you help me, I'll help you. I know some good people, I can get you better protection than the Joker could ever provide," This was partially true, some did owe him favours for the fear toxin he sold but he'd hardly call them good people.

"How could I help you?"

"Neither of us wants to be around the Joker but we both need to pretend so we can keep our lives. We could fool him and escape Harleen," She looked cheered up but sceptical of Jonathan's 'plan'.

"How?"

"You're smart Miss Quinzel, I'm sure you could take him down. I'll help the best I can from this chair," Quinzel looked happy, pleased with the vague compliment Jonathan had given her.

"Okay Dr Crane, you got's yourself a deal. Please call me Harley, that's what my friends call me," She smiled. Jonathan mentally noted that she was easily comforted and smiled back.

"Then you may call me Jonathan. Since we're friends," he found it difficult to keep the bite out of his voice but Quin... Harley seemed delighted. "Weren't you supposed to knock me unconscious?" Jonathan asked. He needed to gain her trust, it wouldn't be as difficult as he thought but he still had a small sacrifice to give before she would be completely controlled. Harley looked at the canister she had dropped. It had rolled across the room and lay halfway between where Harley stood and Jonathan's chair.

"Yeah... but..." She started, looking between him and the container.

"Harley, you need to follow the Joker's orders for a while so he doesn't suspect anything,"

"You sure?"

"Yes. I may not like re-living my past memories but I'd rather that then see you hurt," She looked surprised then blushed and Jonathan internally smirked at her. She wasn't exactly difficult to manipulate.

"Okay Jonathan," She picked up the canister, took off the lid and poured some of the liquid inside onto a cloth. She came towards him and smiled sadly "Sorry," she placed the cloth over his nose and mouth and Jonathan stared into her eyes as he slipped into the familiar darkness that he seemed to spend more time in than the light.

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**A/N: Jonathan spends more time in flashback than most. Thanks to all the reviewers from last chapter, reading your reviews make me far too happy for my own good. Hope you liked the chapter, please review. I will need to consult my super beta friends on the next chapter but I'll try not to take too long with it.**

**...review.**


	6. Chapter 6

******Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and the characters within them are not mine.**

**Warnings: Violence, swearing, slash, rape and the Joker is in this fic. Though this chapter is pretty tame.**

**A/N: Sometimes I wish I'd given Jonathan a past that involved less sex. You know the drill, enjoy and review. **

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**Chapter 6**

"_I don't feel like it tonight,"_

"_Why not?"_

"_I just don't, I'm tired Ichabod. I'm really tired,"_

"_You don't do anything! How can you be tired?"_

"_Don't shout, Jonathan's in the room,"_

_Jonathan looked up from the thesaurus he had been pretending to read, surprised to be mentioned. He was sitting on the floor beside the bookcase while his parents sat on the couch. His dad didn't look at him, just continued leaning over his mom._

"_He won't remember this," His dad dismissed. Jonathan made a note to 'remember this' just to show his dad he could. He went back to his pretend reading so he could continue watching his parent's argument without them noticing. _

"_You still shouldn't," His mom crossed her arms. His dad sighed and slumped back on the couch._

"_You were more fun before we had the kid," Jonathan winced and his mom glared at his dad. His dad rolled his eyes at her before catching sight of something across the room and grinning. He got up from the couch, kneeling on the ground and picking something small off the floor. Jonathan's dad sat back down on the couch and his mom started screaming. Jonathan almost dropped his thesaurus at the abrupt sound. _

_She suddenly went quiet and stared with wide, horror filled eyes at the outstretched palm of his dad's hand. Jonathan craned his neck to see what his dad was holding. It looked like a small black dot... no, it was an insect. No. A spider. Neither of his friends liked spiders, they were 'icky' according to Sarah, but his mom's reaction was extreme._

"_Well?" His dad cupped his other hand over his palm, trapping and covering the spider, then jerked his hands forward without opening them to mime throwing it into her face. She squeaked and nodded. His dad smiled, clapping his hands together and squashing the spider between them. His parents got up from the couch and his mom gave him a weak smile as they left the room, saying_

"_Don't come into our room for a while honey," as they passed. Jonathan nodded once. When they were gone he put his thesaurus back in its place in the bookcase and pulled out the biggest, most un-used book instead. He crawled across the floor for the next hour searching under the cabinets, the couch and it any cramped dark places for spiders, squashing any he found._

_The next day, as Jonathan walked around aimlessly on the simple instructions "Go and do something outside, be a real man for a change," from his dad, he spotted a group of older boys picking on a boy around his age near the trees around the park. He kept to the shadows and considered turning back to avoid being the older boys next target. Curiosity got the better of him and he climbed a tree as quietly as he could to watch._

"_Stop it!" Jonathan recognised the younger boy as Tommy, a nasty kid who picked on him and his friends from time to time._

"_No way, this is way too much fun,"_

"_Your brother's a total wimp,"_

"_Yeah, I can't believe he's so scared of these little things," One of the older boys held a wriggling spider between his fingers. They went off laughing towards the park, Tommy following them after a second of looking around, like he was considering running off. Jonathan stayed in the tree for a while after Tommy left, just thinking to himself._

* * *

Jonathan awoke to see the Joker standing a few feet in front of him, holding a canister like the one Harley had poured chloroform from earlier. He could hear sobbing coming from the corner of the room. Through the haze that often comes with multiple head injuries, Jonathan could see the Joker giving him a slightly surprised look.

"You shouldn't be awake yet," he came forward, lifted his arm and smashed the container into Jonathan's head until he blacked out again.

* * *

"_Wha's wrong Sarah?" She'd just run over to where he was poking a insect infested rock with a stick, tears running down her cheeks and a very sad look on her face._

"_Tommy stoled my ribbon an... and threw it up in the big tree and now I can't get it back and it was my favourite ribbon!" She cried. Jonathan growled. He hated that Tommy. He was always pushing him and Sarah around._

"_I'll get it back," Jonathan spoke, looking at the rock he had been poking, an idea forming in his head. _

"_Really? Can you?" Her face lit up and she smiled at him._

"_Yeah. Yeah I'm sure I can," he quickly smiled back at her then returned his attention back to the rock "Can I use your bag? I need it to get your ribbon back,"_

"_Okay," Sarah beamed brightly and handed over the little bag she took everywhere with her._

"_Tommy!" Jonathan called as he walked towards the boy under the big tree. Tommy was taller than Jonathan with brown hair that he always gelled into spikes. Jonathan stopped when he was a few feet from Tommy, his hands behind his back._

"_Yeah?" Tommy saw Jonathan and smirked "What do you want Specky?" _

"_You threw Sarah's ribbon up that tree. I want it back," Jonathan spoke calmly. _

"_Or what Specky?" Tommy sneered and came right up to Jonathan. Jonathan held out his hands. He had one large spider in his left hand and a bunch of smaller spiders crawling all over his fingers and up his arms. Tommy yelped and jumped back._

"_Or the spiders will get you. Go get the ribbon," The white faced Tommy scampered up the tree and brought the ribbon down, dropping it on the ground then running away screaming and crying. Jonathan put the big spider in a bush and brushed the others off his arms. Then he picked up the ribbon and left to find Sarah._

_School was never very interesting but Sarah always tried her best to make things 'fun'. Jonathan watched her leap around with her rescued ribbon tied onto the end of a stick. He had no idea what she was doing but he tried to look as happy as he could when she looked over at him. He didn't notice the man approaching him and jumped when a low voice suddenly spoke._

"_Hello Jonathan... do you prefer Jonny or John or..?" Jonathan took at step back from the man and looked up at him. Oh, he was just the man who had been in the classroom earlier, Mr Strong? The teacher had called him something like that._

"_He's Jonathan, he won't let me call him Jonny," Sarah had suddenly appeared by his side, answering the man's question for him._

"_That's because it's stupid," Jonathan mumbled to her, still not really trusting this man. Maybe it was his beard..._

"_Okay, Jonathan it is then. Is your daddy called Ichabod?"_

"_Yes," Jonathan replied shortly, putting his hand on Sarah's shoulder and pushing her back slightly, away from the man._

"_I knew him when I was just a little older than you. Now, what is your mot... mummy's name?" Sarah took Jonathan's hand from her shoulder and held it, giggling slightly. Jonathan didn't answer the man, still wary of his odd questions, until Sarah nudged him and said,_

"_Go on,"_

"_She's called Katrina," Jonathan finally spoke. The man smiled at him and patted him on the shoulder._

"_Well done for remembering such long names," With that he left. _

"_Weirdo," Jonathan muttered, Sarah giggling. Then he saw she was holding his hand._

"_Ger'off," He took it back quickly before anyone noticed them. Sarah pouted and crossed her arms._

* * *

"Finally. You wake up early then won't get up for ages!" Jonathan saw the Joker's face inches from his own. His hot breath wasn't pleasant and Jonathan felt slightly nauseous already.

"Did you ever think that might be from hitting me over the head?" Jonathan replied groggily. His vision was slightly blurred even though he was wearing his glasses and his head throbbed intensely. The Joker laughed and grabbed Jonathan's head, sticking his thumbs under the edges of his cheekbones and pulling them up.

"It almost looks like you're smiling," Jonathan didn't react "Now I want you to tell me everything," The Joker moved his thumbs but kept his hold on Jonathan's head, staring directly into his eyes with a challenging look. "Ev-ery-thing," he growled. Jonathan quickly considered his options; he could tell the Joker everything, putting himself in an even weaker position but avoiding the full extent of the clown's wrath; he could keep quiet and prepare for whatever punishment the Joker could dream up or he could lie, possibly being found out later and having to face the Joker then. Overall, his options were not good. He resisted the urge to sigh and made a quick decision.

"Um... Joker?" Harley spoke nervously, stepping into the light and standing a few feet from the Joker and Jonathan's chair. She was holding a piece of paper and a parcel wrapped in brown paper and tied with string. The Joker sighed, closing his eyes and resting his forehead against Jonathan's. Jonathan didn't have the energy to protest, though he knew he must have a white smudge of face paint smeared across his forehead now.

"What Harleen?" The Joker mumbled, his voice low and... different. He looked different too, Jonathan could swear this man wasn't the Joker. When he blinked the Joker was back.

"They say they've got everything ready and that this is the thing you were asking for," The Joker's head snapped up and he laughed. Jonathan assumed he must be pleased about something.

"Thanks Harleen!" he called to her before looking back at Jonathan and grinning "We'll have to postpone this for now, we have work to do," He stood up and walked over to Harley, taking the items from her hands and holding them under his arm as he twirled her around like they were dancing. Harley looked scared at first but started giggling as she got caught up in the Joker's enthusiasm. Jonathan was immediately suspicious of anything that made the Joker so happy.

The Joker stopped twirling Harley suddenly and shoved the parcel back into her arms, pushing her towards Jonathan and stepping into the darkness. "Untie him and give him our little gift. You know what to do after that," Jonathan heard a door open and close, signalling the Joker's departure from the room. Harley beamed at Jonathan and he gave her a fake smile back.

"You have impeccable timing Harley," Jonathan kept up his fake smile as she approached him and pulled a knife from her pocket. She spoke as she began cutting through his bindings,

"Don'tcha' wanna know why I'm untying you?" She continued before Jonathan could answer "We're escaping Arkham today!" Jonathan didn't reply, mulling this over in his mind to figure out if this was a good thing or not. Harley seemed happy about it but she's rather simple. She hummed tunelessly as she worked and Jonathan slowly began to move the parts of his body she had untied so far. He was incredibly stiff from sitting in the chair for so long.

When the last of his bindings fell to the floor he stood shakily and stretched upwards, tying to ignore the painful protests his muscles gave from being abused like this. Harley handed him the package as he stretched one of his arms out. He looked at it for a moment, unsure whether to open it or not in case it was a trap of some sort.

"Don't worry Jonathan, it's nothing bad," Harley saw his hesitation and grinned. He decided to take her word for it and opened the parcel, smiling for real as he saw the familiar worn fabric. His mask.

"Put it on! You want me to keep your glasses for ya, lord of fear?" The title amused Jonathan, he was so elated from being reunited with his mask he didn't mind Harley's overly cheerful attitude. He took his glasses off and handed them to her, pulling the mask over his head and smiling underneath it.

"Come on, we have escaping to do!" She went to the door and Jon... Scarecrow followed her. He felt ready to face whatever was on the other side of that door.

* * *

**A/N: I'm slightly unsure about the use of break lines to seperate the flashbacks from Jonathan's present. Thank you to the reviwers from last chapter. Please review, I'll try and update as soon as I can.**


	7. Chapter 7

**********Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and the characters within them are not mine.**

**Warnings: Violence, swearing, slash, rape and the Joker is in this fic. Though this chapter is pretty tame.**

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait, lost my motivation and muse again. Heeere it is, enoy and review. **

* * *

**Chapter 7**

It was amazing how vast old Arkham truly was. It had a system of tunnels and passageways so complex only one person had ever memorised them fully and he was the man who built them.

The original Arkham Asylum had been a modified manor house founded by Amadeus Arkham over 80 years ago. It's believed the man worked away at the basement until it became this great leviathan, filled it with cells and patrolled them every night despite the absence of patients. Eventually he was locked in one of them and died.

The manor had been adjusted and knocked away over time. Arkham was filled with more modern furnishings, security and cells now, barely resembling its original state though some of the psychologist's offices still held the distinct looks of the old Arkham manor.

The only un-touched remains were the basement where he now stood, following Harley on a nonsensical route through the dimly lit corridors. Their only guidance seemed to be a smudged, swirling pathway painted with what Jonathan assumed was face paint. The various smiley faces and repeated writings of 'Ha Ha' scratched into walls left no doubt as to who had left the trail.

Jonathan knew that they'd never have been found by any Arkham staff. Most don't know of old Arkham and those that do tend to stay away, making it the perfect place for hiding anything that needs to be hidden.

_Ready or not...._

Jonathan looked sharply to his right as he heard a voice. He cursed himself for reacting in front of Harley but luckily she hadn't noticed, still engrossed in following the smears of paint. He immediately silenced the foolish thoughts of horror stories psychologists would tell each other about Arkham's ghost wandering old Arkham and focused his attention on following Harley. He noticed she wore her hair in two bunches like a child. She was an odd girl. Maybe he'd have a chance to gas her before he got away from the Joker.

"I like your hair," Jonathan pushed up his mask slightly so he wasn't speaking through the voice changer. He didn't want to frighten her. Not yet anyway. She looked over her shoulder, looking away from the trail for the first time since they'd left the room, with a surprised look that quickly changed to a bright smile. She stopped walking as they reached a corner and turned to face him.

"Thanks! I kinda thought it wasn't very professional..." she trailed off, touching the ends of one of her bunches and twiddling the hairs between her fingers.

"No no, it's lovely," Jonathan assured her, speaking softly and smiling. He reached out and lightly stroked his fingers through the bunch she was fiddling with, making sure to brush his hand ever so slightly against hers. Her face was shocked for a moment before she looked downwards and giggled erratically, blushing a deep pink that looked slightly odd against the usual sickly pallor of her skin. Jonathan smiled, fighting the smirk that threatened to overtake his features.

Since Harley now seemed incapable of doing anything but stare at Jonathan, he decided to draw her attention to the wall behind her.

"Harley, I think we're getting close to the exit," he pointed to the wall and more specifically to the writing scrawled across it.

The inscription 'Almost there!' painted in red and black with a menagerie of arrows pointing down the corridor adorned the wall. Harley looked at it then wordlessly began to follow the trail again.

It wasn't long until they were climbing the irregular assortment of spiral and normal stairways up to the door that lead to a disused, unmonitored back room of Arkham Asylum. He knew it was unmonitored because he had set up the fake camera and recorded the footage that continually looped in the security closet, showing the room to be empty and dull.

They climbed through the door that led to a space below the floor of the room above. From there Jonathan could see a patch of light where the Joker had left the trap door open for them. He and Harley climbed through the trap door into the light of the back room, dusting themselves off as they reached the strangely brightly lit room above. Jonathan hadn't realised how dark the tunnels of old Arkham were. Once his eyes adjusted to the light, Jonathan could see a man sitting in the corner of the room, shuffling a pack of cards and humming tunelessly. He looked up at them and a smile stretched his scars.

"Hello Harleen, Jonathan," The Joker nodded to them, flicking his cards into one hand with a dramatic flourish and pocketing them. Harley clapped and laughed at the simple trick and the Joker took a bow. Jonathan was happy to have his mask so he could hide his disgusted expression.

The Joker checked his watch and giggled excitedly.

He wasn't wearing his normal clown paint, though his skin was stained from the constant layer of paint and his eyes and mouth still held dark circles and a slight tinge of red. The Joker also wasn't wearing his typical clothes, instead sporting an Arkham guard's uniform. He pushed his hair up and placed a cap on his head, completing his look. He looked at his watch again.

"Come on," He opened the door and looked around before leaving, Harley and Jonathan following behind him. Jonathan took his mask off before he followed, not sure what the Joker had planned but assuming he was pretending to be a guard who had found him and Harley.

The Arkham hallways were unusually quiet and they found their way out of the back doors of the building without detection.

"Good ol' Arkham staff, so easily distracted," The Joker grinned as they walked towards a plain, faded black van. He opened the back doors and hopped in, helping Harley up as Jonathan climbed in. He put his mask back on as the Joker shut the door.

The Joker rapped on the walls of the van and it lurched into motion. Harley stumbled slightly at the sudden movement and Jonathan grabbed her arm to steady her. She looked up at him momentarily then ignored him, sitting down in the van just as the Joker had. She was good, Jonathan was impressed. She knew the Joker wouldn't be so pleased if he knew about Jonathan's offer to help her so she kept her distance, acting as normal. Jonathan sat down too and a thought struck him. He pushed his mask up to speak in his normal voice.

"Why did you put on a disguise if you knew we wouldn't be spotted?" He asked the Joker.

"I just like the jacket," The Joker replied, grinning again. Harley laughed a bit too loudly, a little too late and the Joker gave her an exasperated look. Jonathan pulled his mask back down.

"So, we will be going to one of my many hide outs but we're going on a nice little trip somewhere special first," The Joker smiled at Jonathan. Jonathan felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. He knew he wouldn't like whatever the Joker was planning.

"Where are we going?" Harley asked.

"It's a surprise," She clapped excitedly again and Jonathan tried not to glare through his mask.

After a seemingly long journey where Jonathan declined an offer to play strip poker and watched the Joker beat Harley at a (no stripping involved) card game at least five times, the van stopped moving. The Joker laughed and grabbed Jonathan by his upper arm, yanking him to his feet and pushing the van doors open. He jumped down and pulled Jonathan carelessly with him. Jonathan felt his anger rising at this haphazard treatment and he could swear the Joker's long greasy green straggles of hair were clean cut and styled for just a moment before Jonathan landed painfully but on his feet. He looked at the Joker, who, despite lacking make-up, looked very much his normal self. He pushed it out of his mind and looked around. They were at the park. And most of the park was on fire.

The Joker laughed and threw his hat into the van, narrowly missing Harley who was jumping out at that moment and landing with much more grace than Jonathan. The Joker kept his vice like grip on Jonathan as he dragged him over to a clump of trees that had not yet ignited.

"Look here!" The Joker pointed into the trees where Jonathan saw two young children sitting amongst the branches.

"I guessed you were low enough to kill children," Jonathan spoke emotionlessly, though the voice changer in his mask distorted his tone. The Joker looked at him with an expression of pure delight and somehow laughed even more than normal. He was in hysterics. Harley touched Jonathan's shoulder gently and spoke quietly,

"There's nobody in those trees,"

Jonathan froze and looked again. He saw nothing. No one in the branches.

"Har-Harleen go- ha- get-it," The Joker managed to speak between laughing fits. This was evidently some kind of signal as Harley ran off towards the burning end of the park. The Joker pulled Jonathan along again in the same direction Harley had gone in. Jonathan kicked back to life after getting over his shock and tried to fight back against the Joker.

"Don't make this harder for yourself Scarecrow," The Joker, without even looking, casually flicked open a knife and slashed Jonathan's side. Nothing that would cause significant damage but enough to hurt and draw blood. Jonathan resisted reacting to the pain, gritting his teeth as blood slowly stained his Arkham uniform. It deterred Jonathan from struggling long enough for them to reach their destination. Harley came over, clutching the hand of a small boy who looked absolutely terrified. If Jonathan wasn't bleeding profusely he might have shown some interest. The boy had blonde hair and blue eyes and looked around 7 or 8.

"Oh he's adorable Joker, can we keep him?" Harley smiled as she brought the child over. At the mention of Joker the little boy whimpered. Then he saw Scarecrow and froze with terror. Jonathan smiled under his mask.

"This kid reminding you of anything Scarecrow?" The Joker asked, kneeling down to look at the boy face to face. Jonathan tried to ignore the Joker but every time he blinked the child's facial structure changed. It was only a small difference but Jonathan noticed immediately. Maybe it was the blood loss...

"Step away from the child Joker," The deep voice rang out past the crackling of the blazing fire around them. The Joker snapped up, taking a tight hold of Jonathan again and looking around, growling.

"Come out come out little bat,"

* * *

**A/N: Review!**


	8. Chapter 8

**********Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and the characters within them are not mine.**

**Warnings: Violence, swearing, slash, rape and the Joker is in this fic. **

**A/N: Sorry for the stupid, ridiculously long, month or more long wait. I have no idea what happened, I just took a break I suppose. Now I need to remember what I was doing with this story and try and finish it. Sorry again, try to enjoy and please review.**

* * *

**Chapter 8**

"Batman?!" Harley shrieked, frantically looking all over for the overgrown bat. Jonathan kept still and unmoving, waiting for when Batman would reveal himself. The Joker's grip tightened on Jonathan's arm, he opened his eyes wide and bared his teeth. The fire that raged on around them lit up his face and made him look more terrifying than normal.

A flash of black took out three of the Joker's henchman. The Joker's demeanour suddenly changed, he grinned and laughed, caught up in the excitement of the impeding battle. Although his death grip on Jonathan's arm got tighter.

The Joker still held the bloodied knife. He cackled,

"You can't hide behind your cloak forever Batman, there are ways to see in the dark!" He laughed and held the knife between his teeth while he pulled a pair of sunglasses out of his trench coat. Jonathan looked over to Harleen and saw her also wearing sunglasses and holding one of the Joker's roughly made bomb switches. She pressed the button on it and Jonathan expected to hear an explosion.

Instead the whole park turned white. The Joker had set up floodlights throughout the entire park. Jonathan held a hand over his eyes. He couldn't see anything and his eyes stung. He blinked furiously to try and regain some of his vision but nothing worked.

The Joker suddenly ran, taking Jonathan reluctantly with him. He could swear the Joker dragged him through fire at one point.

"God you're a dead weight Scarecrow, keep up!" Joker yelled in his face, pausing momentarily then ramming Jonathan against what he assumed was a tree and shushing him. Everything seemed still for a moment then Jonathan felt his head forced back against the tree. He blacked out.

* * *

"_Jonathan?"_

"_What," Jonathan spoke in a monotone, pulling clumps of leaves off the branches of the tree and ripping them to pieces. The boy beside him paused, put off by Jonathan's tone. There was a long pause._

"_Do you still miss Sarah?" The boy asked quietly in his soft, high pitched voice. Jonathan didn't answer and ripped the leaves apart with more vigour. "I'm sorry,"_

"_For what?" Jonathan spoke sharply and the boy shrank back._

"_Nothing," The boy squeaked. The silence returned and more leaves were torn from the tree. "There'll be no leaves left if you keep that up," Jonathan turned to face him with a glare and the boy realised his mistake. He looked scared as Jonathan spoke quietly at first, getting louder as he got angrier._

"_Really Jervis. Do you really think there'll be no leaves left? None at all? In the whole fucking world!" It wasn't an important thing but Jonathan shouted in Jervis' face and Jervis looked like he was going to cry. He blinked furiously and Jonathan continued to glare at him. _

"_Sorry," Jervis choked out, a tear falling down his cheek. Jonathan sighed, he swore Jervis was more emotional than Sarah. Well, than Sarah was..._

"_I miss her too you know," Jervis barely whispered. Jonathan ripped up the remnants of the leaves he had been holding in his clenched fists. He heard Jervis sniff and edge towards him on the branch. Jonathan sighed again and looked up from his hands._

"_Look Jerv-" Jonathan only managed to say half of the name as Jervis had suddenly leant forward and pressed his lips to Jonathan's. Jonathan froze. _

_Fear shot through him and he lashed out, shoving Jervis away. Jonathan had forgotten one thing. They were in a tree. Jervis had hit the ground hard and was crying out below him. Jonathan looked down and saw Jervis' face scrunched up in pain, his arm bent at an odd angle and a glimpse of bone poking through the skin. Jonathan couldn't breathe. He couldn't think. He got down the tree as fast as he could and ran._

* * *

"Maybe we could throw water over him," The Joker's familiar voice broke through Jonathan's mind and he knew he was awake. He kept his eyes closed until he heard splashing. The Joker stood dangerously close with a bucket of water poised to throw. He saw Jonathan's open eyes and stood still for a second, obviously still considering throwing the water at him. The Joker must have decided against it as he set the bucket down.

"Harleen! Wake-y wake-y, everyone else is up!" He called out, grabbing a near-by gun and banging on the side of the bucket with it. Harley had been sleeping in a chair in the corner. She jerked awake at the metallic clanging but still looked exhausted as she stared over at him and the Joker.

Jonathan was hand cuffed to a radiator. He watched as the Joker rubbed his eyes and face, smearing his make-up to form strange grey-ish pink patches on his face. Evidently both he and Harleen were tired from whatever ordeal they had been through to get away from Batman. Now he looked he could see Harley had a bandage wrapped around her upper arm. He'd have to ask her what happened later.

The Joker slumped down in front of him, picking a torch up off the clutter laden floor and holding it under his chin like a child telling a ghost story.

"We have a lot of catching up to do. Now where were we up to..." The Joker tapped on his chin with his fingers "Hmmm, I think I'd heard enough about your terrible teens... Oh there's bits of those years you'll never remember..."

"What?" Jonathan interrupted, catching the Joker's statement despite the casual manner he phrased it in.

"Ah ha! I was trying to get your childhood memories," The Joker ignored him "So, what wonderful things have you remembered from your kiddie days?" Jonathan thought for a moment and decided to talk. The Joker seemed to know everything about his life already and would know if he tried to lie.

"My parents and friends," he replied simply.

"Your old daddy and super young mommy? Oh and did you get the memory where you push some kid out of a tree for kissing you?"

"Jervis," Jonathan muttered.

"That's the one! You know, I think he's in Arkham now. Is that it?"

"I believe so, apart from meeting an old man who knew my parents," The Joker laughed then stretched.

"That'll have to be it. Now," The Joker took a key from his pocket and unlocked the half of Jonathan's hand cuffs that connected him to the radiator pipes "We can't have you running off so we're going to be a little... closer, than you might like," He put his hand into the cuff and clicked it into place, locking them together.

"It's bed time Jonathan," The Joker pulled him over to a pile of blankets on the floor and gestured for him to lie down first. Jonathan complied awkwardly, the Joker lying down beside him once he was sure Jonathan was down. Jonathan lay on his back, equally unwilling to face the Joker or put his back to him. The Joker turned so his back was to Jonathan.

Jonathan listened for any signs of sleep in the Joker but he didn't seem to show the normal breathing patterns, although Jonathan was sure he was sleeping. He was truly an unusual man.

Jonathan himself couldn't sleep and decided to observe his surroundings the best he could without moving. He could just see Harley, she was sleeping in a chair in the corner of the small room they were in. The room itself most have been some form of abandoned storage as empty cardboard boxes were messily piled up in one corner. However, it must have been used as a criminal hideout more recently as it held the unmistakable traits of henchmen inhabitancy. In other words, it was extremely filthy. The walls were blackened with grime and old, sometimes blood stained, weapons littered the floor.

Jonathan finally felt sleep tugging at the back of his mind and couldn't see any reason not to succumb to it.

* * *

"_What was it about this time?" The hands that rubbed his shoulders were comforting as he sat at the edge of the bed, drenched in sweat and trying not to retch._

"_I... I don't know," Jonathan rubbed his face with his shaking hands._

"_Just one of the weird ones huh?" Arms slid around his waist and a prickly face pressed against his neck. He relaxed into the hold and he was gently pushed back onto the bed. "It's those stories your psychology classes tell you,"_

"_No it's not,"_

"_It's not healthy, hearing about crazy people doing horrible things..."_

"_It's not the classes Ben,"_

_Ben sighed. He smoothed Jonathan's hair back from his forehead and kissed his brow._

"_Just try to go back to sleep,"_

* * *

"Jonathan! Jonathan wake up! I brought cereal!" Harley's cheerful voice cut through his dream. Jonathan sat up and realised one of his arms was being limply pulled around as the Joker flicked through a newspaper beside him.

"You twitch in your sleep you know," The Joker commented without taking his eyes off the funny pages. Jonathan gave the Joker a cold look and declined the offer of cereal from Harley. He was glad he did as the Joker just took the cereal box and grabbed handfuls out of it, occasionally taking a gulp from the carton of milk. Harley had been talking all the time Jonathan had been awake but he only noticed her when she said,

"... Batman! I can't believe I got away on my first Bat attack! How do you fit so much in your pockets Joker?"

"Oh, magic Harleen,"

"Got a bit of a scratch from his pointy arm thingies but when you see all the other people he's beaten up before..."

"We need to leave here, you can talk about yourself later," The Joker stood, knocking the cereal box to the floor and pulling Jonathan sloppily to his feet. Harley looked put out but she stopped talking instantly.

"Come on," The Joker grabbed Harley's arm and pulled them both out of the room.

"Where are we going?" Harley asked apprehensively. The Joker shrugged and grinned at Jonathan.

"You'll figure that out when we get there,"

Jonathan did not like the sound of that.

* * *

**A/N: I hope that's alright, I wanted to get it out while I had the time. Review!**


	9. Chapter 9

**********Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and the characters within them are not mine.**

**Warnings: Violence, swearing, slash, rape and the Joker is in this fic. **

**A/N: Hey this was a pretty quick update. Thank you to my reviewer from last chapter whom I forgot to thank in a message, sorry about that, I haven't been on my fanfictions e-mail in a while. Anyway, enjoy.**

* * *

**Chapter 9**

Jonathan was surprised to see it was dark when they finally reached outside. He had assumed it was morning because of Harley's insistence it was time for breakfast. However it did make much more sense for them to travel outside at night; although the Bat hung around in the darkness there was still less chance of them being spotted than in open daylight.

The Joker suddenly stopped and Harley almost bumped into his back. A faint click and the feeling of metal slipping from his wrist made the hair and Jonathan's neck stand up.

"What's wrong Joker?" She asked, looking around nervously, probably imagining a Bat swooping down from the sky above. The Joker turned to Jonathan, grinned, and punched him in the head. The Joker shoved him to the ground and kicked him in the side. Jonathan looked up at Harley, who had an expression of mingled surprise and horror on her face. He caught her eye as the Joker raised his foot. Jonathan blacked out as the boot collided with his skull.

* * *

_He opened the door to their flat and stepped in, immediately standing directly in front of Ben who'd obviously been waiting by the front door. He had a face like thunder, glaring down at Jonathan. They stood staring at each other for a moment before Jonathan got over his surprise and shut the door behind him._

"_Yes?" he said, crossing his arms and staring up at Ben, his expression cold._

"_I saw you," Ben stated plainly but Jonathan had known him long enough to know when he was angry. Ben was furious but restraining himself._

"_Saw me doing what?" Jonathan glared, anger seeping into his voice. Ben clenched his fists tightly._

"_With Perkins!" He shouted, his restraint broke and he shook with fury._

"_I crashed into him, he helped me pick my books up then followed me to class!" Jonathan shouted back, though not as loud. _

"_That's not what it looked like to me,"_

"_Get your eyes checked then!" Jonathan yelled. He could see Ben getting even angrier._

"_It looked like you were flirting with him!"_

"_What the fuck!" Jonathan was taken aback. Ben thought he was cheating because he walked with someone to class? "I was not flirting with Perkins!"_

"_Don't lie to me!" Ben shouted as he punched Jonathan in the face. Jonathan stumbled back against the door and put his hands to his face, feeling where Ben had hit him as pain erupted up the side of his face. He stared wide eyed at Ben, as Ben's anger seemed to disappear instantly and the colour drained from his face._

"_Oh my God," Ben breathed. He looked horrified. He reached towards Jonathan but Jonathan flinched back, still wide eyed and shocked. _

"_I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," Ben choked out, reaching slowly toward Jonathan this time and gently pulling his limp hands away from his face. _

"_I'm sorry," He came closer and took Jonathan's face in his hands, looking at him for a moment then softly kissing his forehead. _

"_So sorry," he repeated, tenderly kissing all over Jonathan's face._

"_I'm so so sorry, I love you. I love you."_

_The door bell rang and Jonathan opened the door. It was early morning so it could only be one person._

"_Hi Jonathan!" Emily beamed at him._

"_Hello Emily," Jonathan replied with much less enthusiasm but a small smile. _

"_So I heard..." she stopped mid sentence as she looked at Jonathan "How did you do that?" She gestured to her own eye. Jonathan cringed inside then quickly though of an excuse._

"_Oh that, I just... bumped into a door," It was a terrible lie but it seemed to work as Emily looked sympathetic and lightly touched his cheekbone._

"_Oh you poor thing, that looks bad,"_

"_Thanks,"_

"_Not like that! I meant it looks painful," She took her hand back, "Anyway... what did I come round for...? Oh yes! Sam said he literally bumped into you yesterday, you know Sam Perkins?"_

"_Yes, he was very talkative," Jonathan forced a smile and invited Emily inside._

* * *

As he opened his eyes a hand was placed over his mouth and a quiet shushing sound made.

"I'll stay with him 'til he wakes up Joker!" Harley called. Jonathan had been placed in a chair and tied onto it by his wrists and ankles. Harley sat in another chair beside him and a third chair lay on the floor in front of him.

"It won't take long, knock him out if he wakes up before I come back," The Joker's voice sounded from somewhere further away. He must be in another room. A door slammed and Harley muttered.

"Asshole," before taking her hand off Jonathan's mouth and smiling. "Hey Jonathan," There was an edge of sadness to her voice as she looked at him, or more likely the bruising which he could feel covering his face. She smoothed his hair back from his forehead and pushed an ice pack against the side of his face.

"Hey Harley," Jonathan replied, taking the opportunity to make his voice more raspy and pathetic than usual to gain sympathy from her. It worked and he saw her face fill with pity. This was an easy way of controlling her. "Harley..." he had an idea, something which would cement Harley to him with false sentimentality.

"Yeah Jonathan?"

"I call you Harley... a shortened version of your name..."

"Do you want me to call you Johnny?" She was quick. Quicker than he expected her to be. Well she must have got that internship somehow...

"I'm not fond of Johnny to be honest,"

"Oh," She sat back and thought for a moment before a bright smile lit her face. "What about J?" Jay? It'd do. It had to be something she'd chosen to make it look like she had the control.

"That's nice," Jonathan smiled as pleasantly as he could manage. "Only use it when the Joker isn't around though,"

"Okay J," She smiled coyly.

"You need to knock me out again," Jonathan spoke softly. Harley smiled sadly once again and picked up a bottle of chloroform and a cloth from beside her chair. She tipped some of the liquid onto the cloth and pressed it against his nose and mouth.

"Night night J." She whispered as the world faded in front of Jonathan's eyes.

* * *

"_Hello Jonathan dear, I know you don't want to talk to me but this is important..."_

"_It's me again Jonathan, please call,"_

"_Jonathan, your dad is dead. I didn't want to tell you like this but you never called back,"_

_Jonathan froze beside the answering machine. He shakily picked up the phone and slowly dialled his old home phone number. It rang three times before she picked up._

"_Hello, Crane residence,"_

"_Hi mom," Jonathan said in a quiet voice._

"_Oh Jonathan, I'm sorry about the message. I didn't know what to say so..." His mom's voice was so familiar even though he hadn't properly spoken to her in months._

"_I didn't call because I thought he might answer," Jonathan cut her off. _

"_I know this is early Jonathan but... he left both of us money. Quite a lot," She quickly gave him a summary of how much he'd been left and where he had to go to get it transferred to his bank account. "I know you don't want my advice..."_

"_Mom, it was dad I hated. Not you,"_

"_I want you to go to university Jonathan. I know someone who can help you, write down this number," He grabbed a pen and paper and she slowly gave him a phone number that he recognised._

"_Professor Strange?"_

"_Director now sweetie, please call him,"_

"_I will," Jonathan almost panicked as a pair of arms wrapped around his waist and a body pressed itself against his back. He pushed the blonde away, shushing him and whispering "This is important,"_

"_Jonathan... I've met someone. He's nice but he wants to move away from America... and I want to go with him," His mom sounded almost guilty._

"_Take the money and run,"_

"_Where should we go? Brian hasn't decided yet, maybe I could persuade him..." Jonathan grabbed his sulking boyfriend._

"_Where should my mom move to?" Jonathan knew what answer he'd get even before the boy's mouth opened. _

"_England,"_

"_You're so predictable," he smiled then turned back to the phone "Go to England mom,"_

"_I'll see sweetie, England would be nice," Jonathan heard a clattering from her end of the line "I have to go Jonathan," Jonathan held back a sound in his throat as his boyfriend slipped his hands into his jeans._

"_I have to go too. Take care mom,"_

"_Be good Jonathan and please talk to Hu... Director Strange. Goodbye dear,"_

"_Bye mom," He put the phone down and let himself be pushed against the wall._

"_Ah Jonathan, I'm so pleased you're doing something with your life,"_

"_Thank you Professor Strange," Jonathan said flatly, the twinges of pain all over his body not improving his mood._

"_I am sorry, that was rather back handed. I meant I'm glad you're going to college and have stopped your... debauchery,"_

"_What did I actually do?" Jonathan asked. He'd lost a lot of his memories. He got the feeling something or someone was completely gone. Apparently he'd managed to pass high school though._

"_I don't think it would be a good idea to tell you this close to the events happening but I'll tell you one day my boy, I promise. Now I have someone for you to meet," Strange pressed the button on his desk for his secretary and spoke into the microphone. "Send in Miss Hanes please," In a matter of seconds a mousy brown haired girl opened the door to the office and looked nervously inside. _

_"Hello Emily, please come in and sit down," The girl sat down and gave Jonathan a quick smile, which he returned politely and then focused his attention back on Strange. _

_"Jonathan, this is Emily Hanes, Emily this is Jonathan Crane. I'll be keeping an eye on both of you throughout your years at university due to both of your high abilities and... unusual backgrounds," He smiled._

"_So you don't remember anything?" Emily asked as they sat on a wall in the Gotham University campus after their first day of class._

"_I remember a few things, just not much. Do you mind me asking what your 'unusual background' is?"_

"_Oh, my mother was crazy," Emily laughed "Couldn't do much for me so I raised myself," _

"_I'm sorry," Jonathan said automatically._

"_Ah don't be," She waved her hand at him in a gesture of dismissal. "Y'know... we should do something fun," A wave a dread passed through Jonathan's body at her words but he kept his voice light hearted._

"_Such as what?"_

"_We're going to behave like real college students and party!" She jumped off the wall and grabbed his arm. "Come on, I know where there's a great one tonight!" Jonathan allowed himself to be dragged along. From what he could remember he hadn't been to many parties, so he might as well try..._

"_Oh and don't worry, I'm not going to try and straighten you up," Emily winked at him. Jonathan blinked._

"_What?"_

"_It's pretty obvious Jonathan, that's why hot guys have been flirting with you all day,"_

"_They have?"_

"_God you're oblivious, of course they have! You're hot! You'll meet someone in no time," Jonathan felt his face warm up and Emily giggled._

"_We'll see,"_

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**A/N: I wrote most of this in one day. Inspiration struck big time. Please review.**


	10. Chapter 10

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**Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and characters are not mine.**

**Warning: Lots of violence including domestic violence, swearing, slash... I think that's everything from this chapter.**

**A/N: Sorry. Yes I know, it's been ages hasn't it? Thank you to any reviewers from last chapter and really any reviewers overall. I'm using 'x' to seperate the different bits of flashback to avoid confusion between scene jumps. This one is very flashback heavy. Enjoy.**

**Last time: Jonathan started remembering his college years and made headway into controlling Harleen.**

**

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**Chapter 10**

"_So you've been pulled along to one of these things too huh?" Jonathan had been hanging around in the kitchen for over half an hour now, trying to avoid everyone he'd rather not talk to at the hell-ish party. Someone else had been in the kitchen before he'd got there but he'd assumed they'd leave soon. He was a tall, fair haired guy who looked like he should be at the centre of the party rather than hanging around in the kitchens. He hadn't left though and he'd been staring at Jonathan when he thought he wasn't looking. Jonathan was surprised that he'd spoken to him._

"_Yes," Jonathan sighed, answering the question._

"_I've never been good with parties," He walked across the kitchen and lent on the counter beside Jonathan "I'm Ben, Ben Adams,"_

"_Jonathan Crane," There was a pause where neither of them spoke, just standing beside each other. Jonathan stared at the fridge like it held the answer to the meaning of life just to avoid looking at Adams._

"_So..." Adams began. Jonathan looked up at him to show he was listening. "Do you... want to dance?" Jonathan's surprise must have shown on his face as Adams flushed and started stuttering "Was I way off there? I'm sorry, my gaydar is terrible..."_

"_No, it's alright... I'd..." He'd take a chance, just this once "I'd like to dance with you," Adams'... Ben's face broke into a smile and they left the kitchen together._

x

"_Did you sleep with him?" Emily blurted out as Jonathan opened his front door._

"_No preamble to that?" Jonathan smiled, gesturing for her to enter._

"_Did you?" She re-asked as she walked through the door and into the sitting area._

"_Maybe," Jonathan replied, following her and sitting beside her on the couch._

"_Oh my God that means yes!" She exclaimed._

"_Not necessarily,"_

_

* * *

_

Muffled voices and shouting vaguely permeated the darkness but Jonathan's vision refused to focus and the unclear shadows surrounding him just faded away once again.

* * *

"_Are you okay? Have you never done this before?" He sat at the side of the bed, trying to breathe properly. Ben sat behind him, currently holding his slightly shaking body in his arms. He leaned over Jonathan's shoulder so he could see his face. _

"_Kind of," Jonathan replied, looking at the floor, unable to meet Ben's gaze. _

"_What does that mean?" _

"_It means kind of. Look," He swallowed "I have, but not by choice," He shut his eyes, letting Ben decipher and digest that information. He expected Ben would want to leave now and he made to stand, only to find Ben tighten his hold. He put his face to Jonathan's neck, kissing softly up his neck and jaw line until he reached his ear._

"_I'm sorry," Ben spoke quietly, directly into his ear "Did he hurt you?" Jonathan swallowed again and nodded once. "Then I'd be nothing like him,"_

_When Jonathan awoke he just lay still, the warmth of the bed too intoxicating for him to want to get up._

"_I love watching you sleep," he heard Ben and opened his eyes, turning his head to the left and smiling at him. Ben was propped up on one elbow and grinning "That was a great moving in present," He put his hand on Jonathan's stomach and traced circles around his naval. _

"_I thought you'd appreciate it more than cutlery," Jonathan replied groggily._

"_I've never liked cutlery,"_

"_I've seen your table manners,"_

"_Oi," Ben put his hand flat on Jonathan's stomach and gave him a fake hurt look before grinning. He edged closer to Jonathan then wrapped his arms around him and pulled him closer. Jonathan snuggled into him._

__x

_He couldn't take this anymore. It was every night. Come home, see Ben's glaring face, shout and end up on the floor trying to shield himself him anymore blows. He took a deep breath and unlocked the door of their flat quietly. He opened the door and signed in relief at the darkness. He wasn't home yet. Yet. He wandered through the flat, flicking on lights and discarding his bag in the appropriate place. He was still on edge, his body shaking as he sat down on the couch and put his head in his hands to soothe his stinging eyes._

_His head snapped up at the sound of a knock on the door. He cleared his throat._

"_It's open," He pushed himself into the corner of the couch and fixed his eyes on the door as it opened slowly._

"_Jonathan?" Emily. It was just Emily. She looked around and spotted him. She gave him a confused look. "Why are you all squished up like that?" Jonathan noticed how pushed into the sofa he'd become and tried to relax his body._

"_Oh no reason," He laughed, his voice high pitched "Come in," She ventured into the flat, closing the door behind her and sat beside him._

"_You okay?" She looked suspiciously at him. Jonathan's body was still shaking._

"_Yes, yes, I thought you were Ben, but that would be silly, Ben wouldn't knock he'd just try the door..." He stopped. He really shouldn't have said so much. Emily took one of his hands and stroked it._

"_Well if you're sure," She didn't look convinced. "Look, Strange asked to see us, for our review y'know? See how we're doing, since we'll be finished soon and off out into the real world," She squeezed his hand. "He said to come to his office at seven, do you want me to come for you or...?" She trailed off, letting unspoken words hang in the air._

"_I'll make it, don't worry," He tried to smile again. Emily smiled back sadly._

"_I really should be going, or I could stay until Ben gets..."_

"_No," Jonathan interrupted then once again regretted how quickly he'd spoken, how obvious he was. "I mean, It's okay, I'm fine on my own, really," He didn't want Ben to hit Emily too. She didn't deserve that._

"_Okay but if you're not at Strange's office by quarter past I'm coming here,"_

__x

_Jonathan arrived at exactly five past seven. He stood outside the office for as moment to regain his composure and focus on anything but the pain in his ribs. Then he knocked and stepped inside._

"_Ah hello Jonathan, take a seat," Strange smiled and gestured to the empty seat in front of his desk. The other was occupied by Emily, who looked relieved to see him._

"_Both of you have excellent academic progress and your lecturers assure me that you will pass your final exams. I very proud of you both," He looked at some papers on his desk and smiled at them, then pushed his glasses up his nose and rested his elbows on his desk. His expression changed to a serious one as he spoke. "I'm glad you're doing well academically but as your mentor I must wonder about your emotional well being," He looked directly at Jonathan. "I'd like you to take this as an opportunity to tell me of any personal problems you feel you may not have been able to share before. Emily?" He turned to her and she jumped slightly before settling._

"_Oh, I'm fine. Sam is really supportive. I've made good friends..." She trailed off, now looking at Jonathan too._

"_Then how about you Jonathan?" Jonathan's voice caught in his throat._

"_I'm fine," he replied, his automatic response these days._

"_No you're not Jonathan," Emily spoke, her voice sad and exasperated. "I can see the bruises, the way you walk like you're in permanent pain, the fact that you haven't came out to a party with me in two years!" She was starting to get emotional. "He hits you, beats you up, fucking controls you! I can't believe I didn't notice sooner..." Her anger seemed to deflate and was replaced with sadness. "Oh Jonathan, I'm sorry. I've been a terrible friend,"_

"_So this is Ben Adams, your partner?" Strange kept calm, as always, though anger rose in Jonathan at the pitying look he gave him._

"_It's none of your concern," He glared at Strange. _

"_It is Jonathan, as I know your past and you have a pattern of destructive relationships with males. Starting with your father..."_

"_This has nothing to do with my father," Jonathan growled through clenched teeth. _

"_Then Carter..." Strange continued but Jonathan had had enough. He stood up and exited the room, hearing Emily call his name but she didn't follow him._

__x

_Jonathan banged open the front door of his flat and came face to face with Ben. His anger drained at Ben's stony expression and was replaced with fear. Before he could even think Ben had slammed the door shut and held him against it by the throat._

"_Where have you been?" His hand was too tight and Jonathan just gagged for a moment before it was loosened. He felt drained._

"_You don't care, you're going to hit me anyway. Just do it," He stated. Ben glared and pulled him away from the door by his shirt collar. He threw Jonathan onto the couch and started pacing the room._

"_You always disappear, you're never here," He ranted "But I know where you're going. You're fucking that little skank aren't you!" I stood directly in front of the couch._

"_If you mean Emily, no," Jonathan sat up and readjusted his glasses. He didn't know why he bothered, Ben wouldn't listen._

"_Don't lie to me!" He slapped Jonathan. It stung but Jonathan was used to the feeling._

"_I never have. I've always tried to keep you happy. I wish I hadn't," Ben looked like he was the one who had been slapped. He shoved Jonathan down and stood on the couch. Then he stomped on Jonathan's stomach. Jonathan screwed up his eyes in pain as the wind was knocked out of him. _

_He heard the door open but didn't open his eyes._

"_Oh God, Jonathan!" Emily. His eyes snapped open. He tried to tell her to run but could only mouth._

"_Your whore's here then," __Ben got off the sofa and rounded on her. _

_Jonathan panicked, he rolled off the sofa and scrabbled to his feet. He pulled his tie from around his neck and wrapped the ends around his hands. He looked up. He still hadn't actually done anything to her. Jonathan stood up, went overt o Ben and lifted his arms above his head, bringing them down to his shoulders. He pulled back and the tie pulled against Ben's neck, causing him to gag but Ben was much stronger than Jonathan. He easily pulled the tie and Jonathan's arms from around his neck. He pushed Jonathan to the floor and kicked him in the side. He loomed over Jonathan. _

_Something hit Ben in the head with enough force to send him flying. Jonathan propped himself up on his elbows. Emily stood holding Ben's soccer trophy. It was covered in blood at the top which was dripping down Emily's hands as she stood in shock. Jonathan stared down at Ben's body. It was still. Blood seeped into the carpet from the deep gash in his head. His eyes were still open but glassy and blood dribbled from the corner of his mouth. Jonathan got to his feet and went over to Emily. He removed the statue from her hands and dropped it on to the floor. He wrapped his arms around her and let her sob into his chest for a while. Then she pulled away slightly and looked up at him._

"_What are we going to do?" Jonathan knew exactly who to turn to._

"_Call Strange," _

_

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**A/N: It's nice to actually get back to work on this after so long, especially with that plot twist I have planned. Please review.**


	11. Chapter 11

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Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and characters are not mine.

**Warning: Lots of violence, swearing, slash... there's probably more.**

**A/N: This is a quick update for once. I'm using 'x' to seperate the different bits of flashback to avoid confusion between scene jumps. This one is very flashback heavy. Enjoy.**

**Last time: Loads of colege memories leading to the messy murder of Jonathan's boyfriend.**

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**Chapter 11**

"_I see," Strange had come in ten minutes, bringing two other men with him. Jonathan had been assured they were just there to deal with the body. He and Emily sat on the couch as Strange surveyed the room with an expression of concentration. The two men shifted Ben's corpse into a large black bag._

"_Well," Strange turned to face them "I will tell your landlord that this," He gestured to the large blood stain on the floor "is your blood, Ben ran away after a violent argument and that you will be moving. My men will dispose of the body and trophy,"_

"_The landlord didn't know we were..." Strange seemed very in control of the situation._

"_I know, friends have arguments too. Jonathan, you will need to stay with me for a few days. I suggest you go home Emily," Jonathan was willing to follow Strange's instructions. He felt numb. "Both of you should still attend the party tonight,"_

"_Why?" That was the last thing Jonathan wanted to do at the best of times._

"_Emily's absence would be suspicious and I'm sure she'll need you to get through the night," Jonathan sighed and squeezed Emily's hand. She sat very stiffly, staring directly at the black bag with wide, scared eyes._

_x_

_Jonathan sat in his replacement bedroom, clutching the box of his possessions Strange had just brought him. The room was very plain, obviously a guest bedroom, and larger than any room Jonathan had stayed in previously. Strange re-entered the room and stood by the doorframe._

"_Jonathan, I meant what I said about that party," Strange put another box down on the floor. "The washroom is two doors on the right. Try and enjoy yourself," Jonathan resisted the urge to glare at Strange. "I will be going out myself, so if you make it home tonight I might not be here," Strange handed him a key and left the room. When Jonathan heard the front door close he slowly got off the bed and searched through the boxes for some clean clothes._

_x_

_He suddenly remembered why he hated parties. He'd walked around the place eight times looking for Emily but he couldn't find her anywhere. He picked up another drink and drank it in one go. He stumbled into the kitchen, enjoying the numbness the alcohol brought but not the nausea. He steadied himself on the kitchen bench with his head in his hands, hoping the world would stop spinning. Maybe this was why he normally didn't drink._

"_Are you alright?" A female voice asked. He felt a hand softly touch his shoulder. He took his head out of his hands and looked at the woman._

"_Yes, just a bit..." She had shoulder length brown hair, pale skin and large blue eyes. "What's your name?" he asked, turning to face her and smiling._

"_Oh, Sarah, what's..."_

"_Jonathan, do you want to dance?" He put out his hand. She giggled and took it. He led her out of the kitchen._

_x_

_They crashed into her flat laughing and shushing each other. He lifted her onto the kitchen bench and smashed his lips onto hers, running his hands up her legs and under her skirt. They ended up on her bed, knocking over several dark objects on the way. Their clothes were quickly discarded._

_Jonathan woke up with no idea where he was, a distinct feeling that he was naked and an incredible head ache. He shook off the feeling that this had happened before and looked to his side. A brown haired woman lay beside him. Sarah, that was her name. Jonathan sat up and removed himself from the bed as quietly as he could. He found his clothes, pulled them on and crept out of the front door. He made his way back to Strange's house and tried to open the door silently, hoping Strange wasn't back yet._

"_Interesting evening Jonathan?" He was standing by the door, a slight smile on his face and his eyebrows raised. Jonathan felt his face flush."I think you better get changed,"_

_

* * *

_

Jonathan heard a light beeping sound and the high pitched chatter of women. He opened his eyes. The world was slightly blurred due to his missing glasses but he could tell he was strapped on to a hospital bed. He reached up and touched his head. It was covered in bandages and he could feel stitches. He didn't feel any pain but he knew the drip attached to his arm was giving him a powerful painkiller. A nurse walked into his room and ran straight out again shouting.

"He's awake, Scarecrow's awake!" Jonathan resisted the urge to roll his eyes as Commissioner Gordon and Dr Shield entered the room. He saw the Arkham director standing by the door. The new director always avoided being near Jonathan, as he had taken his job and was evidently afraid of what Jonathan would do if he got too close. He had no real plans for the director but it was always nice to be feared so Jonathan would actively encourage this avoidance whenever he got the chance.

"Are you alright?" Shield asked immediately, picking up Jonathan's chart. Gordon looked tired.

"Never mind that, Crane, have you been involved in the Joker's recent crimes?"

"Oh not voluntarily," Jonathan answered casually, smiling as unpleasantly as he could. Gordon glared at him.

"See! I told you he wouldn't help the Joker. He was obviously kidnapped!" Shield pointed at Gordon, barely hiding his happiness at being 'right'.

"What do you remember Crane?" Gordon ignored Shield.

"I'd be surprised if he remembers anything, he's been in this hospital for three days,"

"I remember being kicked in the head and tied to a chair," Jonathan continued smiling, retaining eye contact with Gordon "And a blonde women..." He knew Gordon would ask him about Harleen.

"Do you know if she is also being held hostage by the Joker?" Gordon jumped at the bait. Jonathan pretended to think.

"Not really, she was just... there, sometimes," Jonathan dropped his smile and looked blankly into Gordon's eyes. He could see the mistrust and annoyance.

"I think that is enough questioning Commissioner. Doctor Crane obviously can't remember much," How wrong Shield was, Jonathan hadn't remembered this much in a long time. Though he knew he was still missing some vital pieces.

"How did I get here?" Jonathan asked Shield but continued to look at Gordon.

"Oh, you were just... found," Shield answered "We assume the Batman brought you as you were next to the broken Bat signal," Gordon wasn't giving anything away but Jonathan knew that Batman hadn't been involved in this. Batman always took him directly to Arkham. So this must be part of the Joker's plan. Maybe he realised how much damage he'd managed to cause 'encouraging' Jonathan to remember and got him a few days hospital stay to recover. He knew he would be back with the Joker soon enough.

The Arkham director cleared his throat from the doorway.

"You'll be going back to Arkham Crane," Gordon stated.

"Personally I don't think you should in your current condition..."

"But you're considered dangerous, so you are," Gordon directed this at Shield, whose lack of professionalism was an obvious irritant to the Commissioner.

"Commissioner?"

"What?" Gordon didn't snap, he was far too used to dealing with criminals.

"I very much doubt that the Joker is finished with me," Jonathan stared blankly at Gordon.

"And why do you think this?"

"I know he's not finished playing with me," Jonathan laughed in spite of himself. Maybe the Joker was rubbing off on him. Shield evidently thought so, by the horrified look he gave Jonathan. Gordon went and spoke to the Arkham director in a hushed voice.

"We're going to need to talk about your experiences with the Joker," Shield cleared his throat.

Gordon re-entered the room followed by a nurse and another officer. Gordon hand cuffed him and the nurse undid the straps that held him to the bed.

Gordon and the officer led Jonathan through the hospital and outside towards an Arkham van where he was handed over to the Arkham officials. They loaded him into the back of the van which had a light green padded interior and long benches attached to each side. One man already sat in a straitjacket, affixed to the wall by straps. Two Arkham officials flipped a coin then one of them was given Jonathan's handcuff key and came and sat in the back of the van. The doors were closed and they started to move.

Jonathan avoided the gaze of the strait jacketed man, who had been staring at him ever since he'd been in visual range.

"Hello Jay, long time no see" The man muttered, rocking backwards and forwards. Jonathan continued to ignore him. "Oh, that's right, you won't remember me," Jonathan couldn't help looking at him. He had messy, dirty blonde hair, wide blue eyes and buck teeth that stuck out as he grinned. Jonathan decided to bite.

"Who are you?"

"Why it's Jervis! Don't you remember the fun we used to have?" Jonathan sighed.

"I suppose you don't have fun anymore do you J? We had lots of fun when we were little kiddies," Maybe he was the boy Jonathan had pushed out of a tree. Jervis' grin got wider and his mad eyes gained a glint of malice while he continued to rock. "Then when you were a teenager..."

Now Jonathan was more interested in the mad man's ramblings. Maybe he was the key to the memories even the Joker didn't think he'd remember. "But you won't remember that pumpkin. You were always far too drunk or away with the fairies to realise what I was doing to you..."

"And what exactly was that?" Jonathan didn't show his surprise and fascination but Jervis' grin still grew wider, showing his yellow, uneven teeth.

"Oh wonderful things Jay, beautiful things... sexual things," Jervis giggled and leaned towards Jonathan the best he could.

"Really," Jonathan sighed.

"Haven't you ever wondered where that scar on your back came from? The one that's not quite a T and not quite a J..." Jonathan didn't make a habit of staring at his back and remained dubious of Jervis' claims. "I made that scar," He continued and suddenly looked angry. "To show everyone that you're mine," He emphasised the last two words "And if that silly clown or stupid little girl want you back, they're going to have to fight me for you Jay,"

A knife ripped through Jervis' straitjacket, taking off the arms from the back where he must have been holding the knife and working away at the fabric while he rocked. Jervis ducked under the straps and rammed the knife into the official's throat before he even had time to react. Jonathan edged away. Jervis stood on the official's unmoving chest and pulled the knife out of his neck. He wiped the blood off on his ripped sleeve. He moved fast, stealing the official's keys and taking the straps off the wall with the aid of a few well aimed slices.

He put the knife between his teeth and rounded on Jonathan holding the straps out. Jonathan's hands were still hand cuffed behind his back. He waited until he took a step forward then slipped down off his seat and kicked Jervis' knees. They buckled and he fell to the floor but he grabbed Jonathan's ankle and pulled him towards him. Jonathan's nails dug in to the padded floor but Jervis was surprising strong.

He flipped Jonathan over and wrapped the straps around his arms and legs tightly, effectively immobilising him. He pulled him to his torso, Jonathan still facing away from him, and wrapped his arms tightly around Jonathan's chest. He stuck his face into Jonathan's hair and breathed in deeply, moaning as he realised his breath beside Jonathan's ear. He put his tongue in Jonathan's ear, causing him to jerk away and dislodge the very unpleasant wetness.

"Oh, you are right J, I should wait until we get home," Jervis whispered with a giggle.

The van stopped. "Now, stay quiet until I get us out of here," Jervis picked up the discarded knife and stood, pulling Jonathan up too. He rested Jonathan against the padded wall and moved the corpse of the official closer to the door. Jervis rested a foot on the body then clamped one arm firmly around Jonathan's chest and held the knife to his throat with the other. "Don't worry pumpkin,"

The doors clattered open "Don't come any closer or I'll kill him," Jervis stated, rolling the body out of the van with his foot. The Arkham officials jumped and stayed back, their stunned gaze flickering between the body and Jervis. Jervis slowly moved forward and put the knife between his teeth while he picked Jonathan up and jumped out of the van.

Jonathan noticed that the van had stopped in the middle of a road and they were nowhere near Arkham. Jervis must have noticed too as he growled as he set Jonathan down, still holding him to his chest and put the knife back to Jonathan's throat. Jervis moved slowly around to the front of the van.

"Clown," Jervis growled when he saw the clown masked henchmen who were providing the road block.

Harleen stood behind them, the Joker's signature make up plastered across her face and a gas mask hanging around her neck. Her white coat was ripped to shreds around the arms and tail and her clothes looked distinctly filthy. As she lacked the Joker's scars Jonathan could see the frown of confusion on her face. They obviously hadn't been expecting Jervis. "Not here in person. See Jay, he doesn't love you as much as I do,"

"Get 'im off 'im!" shouted Harleen and the henchmen advanced with their guns "But don't shoot y' morons, we need Scarecrow back alive!"

"Stupid little girl," Jervis threw the knife towards the henchmen, which they dodged easily but it gave Jervis the time to rummage around in his pocket for something. He pulled out four small, brightly coloured spheres and threw them towards Harley and the henchmen. "Don't breathe," he whispered to Jonathan as the spheres exploded, sending a white smoke into the air. The henchmen starting screaming and dropped to the floor. Was that his fear gas?

Jervis ripped open the van door and picked Jonathan up again. He shoved him into the passenger side, clambered into the driver's seat and slammed the door behind him. He started the van and floored the accelerator pedal. It jerked into life and Jonathan saw Harleen, who had covered her face with the gas mask, run out of the way of the advancing van. Some of the henchmen were not so lucky and the van bumped over several outstretched limbs.

"We're going home Jay," Jervis smiled at Jonathan.

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**A/N:** Yep this is the twist. Please review


	12. Chapter 12

___**Disclaimer: Batman, all his associated worlds and characters are not mine.**_

**Warning: Lots of violence , swearing, slash and this one has disturbing imagery.**

**A/N: This is a short chapter, mainly to get the know the Mad Hatter a bit better before a certain clown returns to try and take back Jonathan. All reviews from previous chapters are greatly appreciated.**

**Last time: Jervis decided to steal Jonathan.**

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**Chapter 12**

Jonathan stayed silent during the journey and Jervis giggled to himself occasionally.

"Don't you want to know how I got your fear gas?" Jervis broke the silence. Jonathan didn't respond but Jervis continued. "I bought it! So simple, you sell it silly!" Jonathan couldn't remember selling to Jervis so he must have ordered it though someone else. He only sold to mobsters and they were normally stupid enough to use it on themselves. "I know you're going to love our house but I still want it to be a surprise," Jervis reached over, grabbed the back of Jonathan's head and rammed it forward against the dashboard.

* * *

_"Hello darling," A blonde man sidled up to Jonathan and grinned a buck toothed grin. Jonathan took another swig from the bottle in his hand. The man was taller than him and must be older by a few years. He seemed interested. Jonathan did need somewhere to sleep tonight..._

_"Hello," He slurred, smiling back at the man "Wha's your name?"_

_"Jervis, sweetie," He brushed a tattered, sweaty bit of hair away from Jonathan's face._

"_That's unush...unsu-al. I'm just boring Jonathan,"_

"_Oh there's nothing boring about you Jonathan," Jervis' hands found their way around Jonathan's waist and pulled him closer. Jonathan let himself relax into the touch, he'd done this before, it wasn't hard... He smiled as Jervis stared down at him and licked his lips. He tried not to jerk away when the hands slipped into his jeans._

_

* * *

_

When Jonathan woke up he found himself sat in a chair at the end of a long table. The table was covered in broken, dusty crockery and playing cards. To his great surprise he was not restrained. He stood up and walked around the table, stepping over broken chairs. The room was dark and the thick carpet was sticky and stained.

"Oh Jay you're awake!" Jervis walked into the room. He was wearing a long, bright green suit jacket with a long tail and a matching top hat. He walked towards Jonathan who continued around the table, not taking his eyes off Jervis. "Do you like our home pumpkin? I think I must have forgotten to clean up last time I was caught but I think it has its charms,"

"Very... Lewis Carroll," Jonathan muttered. Jervis laughed and clapped.

"You're just as smart as I remember you. So, would you like some tea?" Jervis' last sentence echoed around his head...

"_Would you like some tea pumpkin?" He brought the cup to his lips and drank the warm liquid, arms wrapping themselves around him from behind as he did. He suddenly felt nauseous and feel back into the laughing chest..._

"No," Jonathan shook his head to clear it. Jervis frowned.

"Are you okay Jay? It must be from the way that clown," he spat the word "was treating you. You should lie down, poor dear,"

"I'm fine," Jonathan stopped walking around the table, his vision starting to blur. He must not show any more weakness to this mad man.

"Oh Jay, I know you. That means you're feeling abso-tively terrible," Somehow Jervis was by his side, a hand gently rubbing his back and an arm around his waist.

* * *

"_You're not happy with your name dearie? I like it..."_

"_I don't," Jonathan focussed on finding his clothes. _

"_Okay, I'll give you a new name. Maybe just a nick name..." Jervis lay back on the bed and stared at him upside down, seemingly deep in concentration. What did it matter what Jervis called him? He'd probably never see him again. He pulled his jeans on. He didn't remember them being this slack, the waistband staying inches away from his stomach when he pulled them up. "I'll call you Jay!"_

"_That's nice," Jonathan said automatically, pulling his vest over his head. What else had he been wearing...?_

"_Well that's perfect," Jervis got off the bed "You don't have to leave you know, I like you. I'd love for you to stay," He picked up Jonathan's missing hooded top from the side of the bed. Jonathan quickly tried to assess what Jervis wanted from him. He realised he didn't really care what Jervis wanted to do to him as long as he wasn't running all night... "So how about it?" Jervis smiled, swinging the hooded top gently from side to side by the hood using his index finger._

"_Yes... I'd like that..." Jonathan tried not to sound desperate but ended up sounding pathetic instead. Jervis grinned and clutched Jonathan's hooded top to his chest._

"_Wonderful! I'll go hang this up for you. Come down to the kitchen, I'll get you some tea," Jonathan was slightly on edge. This was very unusual._

* * *

Jonathan awoke yet again. This time he was lying in a double bed, which was clad in a union jack bedspread. He pulled back the covers and sat on the edge of the bed.

"You're awake!" Jervis' head popped around the door and he walked backwards into the room carrying a tray. A full tea set sat on the tray, which Jervis placed on the bedside table. He poured tea from the teapot into one of the cups, added milk and a sugar cube and took a sip.

"I'll let you pour your own so you don't think I'm poisoning you," He grinned." He downed his drink in one gulp and set the cup back down on the tray. "Have some tea and go back to sleep, I'll be going out. I have something to find," With that he left the room, blowing Jonathan a kiss from the doorway before he closed it behind him. Jonathan wasn't going to touch the tea.

"_But you must have something, you're far too thin dear,"_

He tried to stand but the room span when his feet touched the ground. He sat back down on the bed and looked around the room. The dark green wallpaper was peeling off the walls and this room had the same thick, filthy carpet as the other.

He looked across the double bed and saw that the bedside table on the other side held a dusty, teapot shaped lamp and a battered copy of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. The whole of the house seemed to be decaying. Jonathan couldn't recall how long Jervis had been in Arkham but it must have been a while. He also couldn't remember what crime Jervis had committed to be placed in Arkham either.

He hissed and clutched his skull as a sharp pain rocketed through his head. He lay back on the bed, easing the pain as sparks danced around his vision. He shut his eyes.

* * *

"_I could talk to your parents, you shouldn't cut your Mom from your life just because your Dad's an ass," Jervis looked at Jonathan and took his hand._

"_No, it's fine. I'd rather never see either of them then have to talk to my father ever again," Jonathan winced at the memory of the last time he'd seen the bastard "Also, him seeing you is not going to help," He sighed. Jervis just smiled._

"_We could go and show him how happy you are,"_

"_He doesn't care if I'm happy," Jonathan snorted. Jervis frowned._

"_Well that's not right,"_

"_Where have you been?" Jonathan jumped as the door banged open but settled when he saw Jervis' buck toothed smile. He had wondered when Jervis would return but had been distracted by his book. Jervis walked over to where Jonathan was sat on the couch._

"_I got you something," He knelt down and presented Jonathan with a small, slightly damp box. Jonathan opened it and yelped. A severed finger lay in the box, slightly shrivelled and pale but obviously... fresh. Jonathan opened and closed his mouth at Jervis, completely lost for words."It's your dad's!" Jervis declared happily._

"_What?"_

"_Oh, don't worry too much. He's still alive, I made sure," Jonathan took a deep breath._

"_My mom wasn't there, was she?"_

"_No no, I waited until she went shopping and took him to a back alley,"_

"_O... okay. Thanks," Jonathan looked at the finger "Do I have to keep it?" Jervis laughed._

"_We can burn it," He kissed Jonathan briefly on the lips then took the box from his hands, placing it on the table beside the couch. He climbed on to the couch and on top of Jonathan who wrapped his arms around Jervis' waist._

* * *

Jonathan awoke with a start, the pain in his head lessened but his latest memory filling his mind with vivid images. That might explain, in some ways, how Jervis might have ended up in Arkham. He was obviously deranged and seemed to have picked Jonathan as the object of his obsession.

He sat up and froze. Jervis was standing at the foot of the bed, grinning at him. Jonathan wondered how long he had been there and, more importantly, what he'd been doing while he was there.

"You don't sleep very peacefully Jay. You never did," Jonathan didn't respond, keeping eye contact with the mad man. "I brought you something. Something you'll like," A sense of dread built in Jonathan's chest but he kept his face free of expression. Jervis placed a brown cloth at the end of the bed and pushed it towards Jonathan.

It was his mask. Jonathan slowly reached out and took it, rubbing the rough fabric between his fingers. "I knew you'd love it," Jervis came round to the side of the bed. Jonathan took his eyes off his mask and looked towards Jervis.

His face was slightly swollen and his right arm had been slashed with a knife. His sleeve was cut open and covered in dried blood and Jonathan could see the wound underneath. From what he could see it had stopped bleeding and wasn't too deep.

"Now that you have that dearie, you can join me next time," Jervis sat down on the side of the bed, grinning at Jonathan.

"I'll need fear gas," Jonathan looked back to his mask, staring into the empty eye holes. Jervis laughed.

"I'll get you some more tea,"

Jonathan realised he may have agreed to more than he intended.

* * *

**A/N: Oh dear. Jonathan's memories are starting to leak. Please review /beg**


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